“What the fuck is it with you andarmpits, Cruz?!” Daniel all but exploded, but I couldn’t stop staring at the chit that held my execution sentencing.
Rina tapped my thigh, and when I looked at her, she signed,Are you okay?
I blinked at her. “Am I a cult sacrifice?” I asked. “Was today just a ploy to get me here and offer me up to some demon you guys worship? How did you rope Taron and Tori into helping you? Was that blowjob you gave me earlier your way of saying sorry to me because you’re going to gut me and eat my intestines in order to achieve immortality?”
Rina searched my face for a beat too long, and I knew she was fighting back a smile with the way she kept pursing her lips every other second. But, after a while, she regained herself, then signed,I’ll get the wax, before getting to her feet and running up to her bedroom.
The universe was playing with me. Or maybe it was the Illuminati…
Satan? Yeah, maybe he was behind all of this.
I honestly couldn’t tell.
“Applying some talcum powder on the area that’s to be waxed makes the process more bearable,” Cruz said.
I took my eyes off the chit so that I could glare at him proper. “I thought you were asaint,” I all but hissed at him. “But even geniuses can be wrong, so I only have myself to blame for falling for your saccharine act of companionship.”
Cruz frowned. “Sorry, man. I really wasn’t expecting you to get the dare. I was hoping that this idiot,” he pointed at Daniel, “would be the one to pick up my chits.”
Daniel acted offended. “Ex-squeezeme?! My armpits are hairless and innocent, thank you very much.” He clicked his tongue. “Serves you right for trying to get unnecessary revenge on me when all I’ve wanted us to do today is have fun.”
Before Cruz could fire back a response, Rina came bounding down the stairs with actual,literalglee on her face, and a small, pink box clutched in her right hand.
God, I’d accidentally fallen irreversibly in love with a real-life Harley Quinn.
Fuck me twelve ways to Easter.
She came to a stop in front of me, a little out of breath, then signed,Take off your jacket and shirt.
“Absolutely not,” I told her. I was still sitting cross-legged on the floor, so I had to crane my neck a little in order to look at her.
She placed her hands on her hips and huffed, then turned to Cruz with a silent command on her face. She then gave another kind of scary look to my brother, and I watched, dumbfounded, as both the giants in the room rose to their feet.
No.
Não.
Non.
Níl.
Óxi.
“Stay. Thefuck. Away. From me.” I dragged myself away from the two towering heaps of muscles, but they continued to advance toward me. “Fuckingstop!”
“Don’t make this hard, bro,” Taron said. “It’ll be over in seconds; just co-operate.”
“EASY FOR YOU TO SAY!” I yelled, and slid back more. My bitten ass was burning, but that’s the least I had to bear in order to save mylife.
“Calm down, man,” added Cruz. “It’s just wax.”
“You…” I pointed a finger at him. “Fuck you.”
“I deserve it,” he agreed. “But you’re being a damn baby about this. You’re a constructor, for Christ’s sake. Surely you’ve had injuries in the past that hurt far more than wax ever will.”
“That’s beside the point,” I told him. “Those werenecessaryinjuries; this – this isTORTURE.”
“Look…” Cruz started, but stopped abruptly and grabbed my legs. Before I even knew what was happening, two large arms hooked themselves under mine and lifted me, and then, Cruz and Taron were carrying me over to the center of the gathered circle.
