Me:Does being a pretentious cunt come naturally, or have you advanced in it somewhere?
Gavin:We’re so good together, Cigs. Think about it. We’re perfect for each other.
Oh, he didnotjust say that.
Me:We fucked, Gavin. A few times. That’s it; that’s all it was.
Gavin:For you, maybe, but not for me. Maybe it was at first, but my feelings have changed.
I suddenly feel hotter than I did minutes ago. I start sweating in earnest, and the air around me feels too thick to breathe in.
Me:This is not what we agreed on, Gav.
I’ve never expected anything more than sex from guys, and Gavin isn’t an exception.
Gavin:So? Don’t you want something more?
With him? Absolutely not. Especially because he’s got a girlfriend. And also because he hasn’t got a single loyal bone in his body.
Me:Where’s this coming from, Gav? And what about Nicole? You can’t keep doing this to the women in your life.
Gavin:Being away from you for a week has made me realize things. I don’t want Nicole anymore. I want you.
I close my eyes briefly, take a couple of deep breaths, and face Julian.
“Will you excuse me for a moment?” I tell him. “I need some fresh air.” More like a ton of it.
Julian seems confused. “Now?” he glances at the stage, where Mom is displaying the new winter-wear on the screen. “During the reveal?”
Fuck.
“Yeah, I just…” I pretend to act tired. “The crowd is making me claustrophobic.”
He furrows his brows in concern. “I can come with you,” he suggests. “Maybe get you some water as well.”
I shake my head. “That’s not necessary, but thanks, Julian.”
He nods. “Of course.”
I give him a quick hug and practically run out of the ballroom.
I all but sprint through the empty hallway, and the cool air from the cassette air conditioners brings a much-needed chill to my sweaty body.
Fuck this night. Fuck that ballroom. Fuck those elites.Fuckeveryone.
I’m so close to bending over and screaming until I can’t feel my throat.
Mave was right in his assumption about my mood earlier. I just wish I had a drink in my hand right now. It’d make things endurable to some extent, at least.
I continue to breeze through the massive hallway, but come to a stop when I find a gorgeous, gold-threaded divan placed against the marble wall just ahead of me.
“Thank fuck,” I whisper, and all but slump on it, only now realizing how much my legs and hips hurt from standing for hours without a break.
I look at my screen again, and, because I have no other choice but to set things straight, I continue my chat with Gavin.
Me:Look, Gav, I’m really sorry. I can’t do this; this isn’t what I want.
Gavin:From me, or you don’t want it in general?
