I mirror him, then go in for another punch.
He swerves just in time, then reels an arm back, but I block him when he’s close enough, and hit him with an uppercut – right in the chin.
He barely manages to keep his balance, and spits blood on the concrete floor before wiping his mouth with the back of his taped hand.
“Thisis what I’m talking about,” I say, then push my damp curls away from my forehead. “Every day we do this, you give me stupid fucking openings to hit you; to fuckinghurtyou. You really thought I wasn’t noticing any of that?”
He ignores me and moves forward, but I step away, making him meet my eyes.
“Jayce, comeon.”
“What the hell do you want me to say?” he sneers.
“That you’re done blaming yourself for what happened 3 months ago,” I sneer back, then get in his space.
He huffs out a chuckle. “You know I can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s a crucial enough mistake that Ineedto remind myself of it in order to not repeat it.”
“Bullshit,” I spit out. “And for the last time: it was anaccident. Nothing more, nothing less. So you better get your shit together, Jayce, because if you don’t, then so help me God, I’ll shove common-fucking-sense down your throat if that’s what it’ll take for you to wake the hell up.”
We stare each other down, and through the array of emotions I see in his eyes, the one that shines quite clearly is acceptance. It’s something similar to what I’d seen all those years ago in the prison cell, when he’d told me why he’d been arrested, and howrightit’d felt to have killed his brother.
He’s accepted his fault with what happened with Rizwana, but what he’s also put into his head is the wrongful idea that he somehowdeservesto be forever punished for his little slip-up. And that’s not good. Far from it, actually.
“Do you want me to punch you in the dick, or have you understood everything I’ve just told you?” I say.
“It’s not a button I can switch off on a whim, Ledge,” he states.
“Well, then tell me what’ll help. I wanna be able to dosomethingabout it.”
“You’ve already taken the brunt of my stupidity,” he tells me with furrowed brows. “And, it’ll be a while before I stop accusing myself for letting that happen, but I’ll do it; I’ll forget.”
“Only because I’m forcing you to?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “You’re not forcing me; you just care in your own way. Besides, if you and Alex and Varsha don’t push me to move on, then who will? I just have to come to terms with…I don’t know, the thoughts in my head. And when I do, I’ll be less of a douche to you and the others.”
I smirk. “You know we love you for your douchery. You wouldn’t be as exciting otherwise.”
“First of all, douchery is not a word. Second of all, stop looking so fucking smug, or else I won’t hesitate in wiping the floor with your pretentious little ass. And you know just as well as I do that you donotwant that.”
My smirk widens at his words. “Do your worst, brother. I can take ya, you know that.” I pull my damp vest off my body and throw it behind me.
Jayce chuckles and does the same with his t-shirt, then quickly goes in for a strike.
I evade it with ease, then jab him in the gut. He groans but recovers quickly, then socks me in my now-healed left side, making me laugh.
We parry each jab with counter-punches of our own – completely out of breath but still pumped by adrenaline. The thrill is too high, and so is the need to be the one to land the final blow.
Duck, rise, block, hit, and repeat. It’s like a dance of sorts – one we’ve been mastering for over a decade now.
I press my feet on the ground, then use my bodyweight to push myself up into a jump. My fist is ready to hit home, but at the last minute, Jayce moves to the opposite side, rendering me off balance, then slides behind me before grabbing me into a sleeper hold. His arms are locked around my neck, and he pushes my head forward against his vise grip, leaving me with no other choice but to tap his bicep in submission.
I let him move away from me, let him put his guard down, and then, when I’m sure he isn’t expecting it, I turn around and spear him with all the strength I’ve got left.
My right shoulder throbs at the force, and Jayce and I all but crash against the floor in an unceremonious heap.
