Hayden shook his head. “Nothing. It doesn’t matter.”
But it did matter, I could tell. The way his shoulders tensed, the way he looked down at his hands. This Tommy asshole had really done a number on him.
“For what it’s worth,” I said, “I think you’ve got excellent taste. In restaurants, anyway.”
He glanced up at me, and I caught a flash of vulnerability before he covered it with that defensive smirk. “We’ll see if you still think that when the food gets here.”
The waitress brought our sake, and I watched Hayden lift the small ceramic cup to his lips. There was something graceful about the way he moved, like he’d done this a thousand times before. Made me wonder what his life in California had been like, before this Tommy character broke his heart.
“So,” I said, taking a sip of the warm rice wine and trying not to wince at the unfamiliar taste, “how’d you know about this place, anyway? You been to Amarillo before?”
“Google,” he admitted with a laugh. “But I used to eat a lot of sushi back home. There was this place in Venice Beach...” He trailed off, that distant look creeping back into his eyes.
“You miss it?” I asked. “California?”
He was quiet for a long moment, turning his sake cup between his fingers. “Sometimes. The ocean, mostly. And the weather. But...” He shrugged. “I don’t miss feeling like I was never good enough.”
The honesty in his voice caught me off guard. “Good enough for what?”
“Everything,” he said simply. “Everyone in California has a dream to be somebody. But only some of them have the money, thelooks, and the connections to achieve it. And I… I wasn’t one of them.” Suddenly he seemed to realize how much he’d revealed. His walls went back up so fast I almost got whiplash. “Anyway, what about you? You ever been anywhere besides Texas?”
I could’ve pushed, but I recognized a subject change when I heard one. I took another sip of sake, letting the warmth spread through me. Maybe he deserved a bit of a break from my sass.
“I’ve been to Oklahoma,” I offered with a grin. “And New Mexico once. Spent most of my life bouncing around different parts of Texas.”
“That’s it?” Hayden looked genuinely surprised.
“Not all of us can be worldly California boys,” I teased, but there was no bite to it. “Some of us are just simple country folk. I just go where the cows are.”
The waitress arrived with a tray full of colorful plates, setting them down one by one. I stared at the array of rolls, some with raw fish draped over rice, others fried and golden.
“This one’s for you,” Hayden said, pushing a plate toward me. “Tempura shrimp roll. Fully cooked, I promise.”
I eyed it suspiciously. “And what’s that green stuff?”
“Avocado,” he said, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “And don’t tell me you’ve never had avocado before.”
“Of course I’ve had avocado,” I muttered, picking up a piece awkwardly with my fingers.
Hayden cleared his throat and pointed to the chopsticks beside my plate. “You might want to use these.”
“Right.” I picked them up, fumbling to hold them correctly. After a few failed attempts, I looked up to find Hayden watching me, lips pressed together like he was trying not to laugh.
“Need help?” he asked, eyes dancing.
“I got it,” I insisted, finally managing to grip a piece of sushi between the sticks. I popped it in my mouth and... damn. It was actually pretty good. The shrimp was crispy, the rice was sticky and slightly sweet, and the avocado added a buttery richness.
“Well?” Hayden leaned forward, a hint of eagerness in his expression.
I swallowed, trying to play it cool. “It’s alright.”
His face fell slightly, and I immediately felt like an ass.
“Fine, it’s delicious,” I admitted. “Happy now?”
The smile that spread across his face was worth the admission. “Try this one next,” he said, pushing another plate toward me.
For the next half hour, we ate our way through the assortment of sushi. Hayden explained each roll, patiently showing me how to dip them in soy sauce, but not too much. And he taught me how to use the wasabi, which I decided was the most vile thing I’d ever tasted. I caught him watching me with something that looked almost like fondness as I tried each new piece.
