“You should be coming back with us,” she said.
I’d told them over breakfast I wasn’t interested in the trust position or coming back to New York. Not now, or ever. “I’m paving my own way,” I’d said.
This announcement was met with a series of objections, followed by, of course, pronouncements about Ben being a bad choice for me. In fact, his being a doctor was a negative in their eyes because he’d constantly be called away for emergencies.“You need someone who’s available to you,” they’d said.
“I can’t, Mom. Like I told you, I have commitments here. I like it here.” It was the first time I’d said it aloud, and it was true. I liked Vermont and all its small-town hippie-dippyness.
“What? Making coffee? Running book clubs? That’s what you like?”
Breathing a sigh of relief that there wasn’t a book club until next Friday, I said, “Safe travels,” to my mom and disconnected the call. I was a disappointment to them, and now I’d lost Ben.
Curled into a ball on my bed, I continued to cry, feeling like the worst kind of failure.
The phrasetoo little, too latekept running through my head. I’d made fun of Vermont and then put Ben in the back corner when it came to my parents. After all, I was well-practiced at putting Ben in his place after Pressman.
Still clutching my phone, I typed another text to Ben, feeling awkward because I’d never begged someone for forgiveness before.
I’m sorry. I was wrong. You planned something special for my birthday, and I acted like a small child. Please, Ben, call me.
Ben’s absence hurt so much, it felt like my heart was stuck in the coffee-bean grinder at work. I needed him to call me, but somehow I knew he wouldn’t. Pride would keep him from coming to me.
A while later, I fell asleep with my palm massaging my chest where my heart lived, and my head pounding over Ben’s silence.
* * *
Monday, I pulled up to Hunnie’s shed, a constant punishing pain in my gut. I’d worked Saturday and Sunday, hoping for a glimpse of Ben, but he never showed his face.
Roderick bombarded me with questions about where I came from, what my parents did, and what life in New York City was like ... until he noticed I wasn’t up for small talk. It might have been the death glare I gave him while slicing a piece of pound cake for a customer.
“You’re here bright and early,” Hunnie said, greeting me from her tiny porch. Funny how her she-shed was small in size but big on personality, just like she was.
I was wondering if there was anything notable about me when Hunnie shouted, “Wait until you taste this honey with rose petals. It’s going to go perfect with the pale pink cupcakes. That book cover was so much fun to work with.”
Approaching, I tried to smile. “It was a great book. Layton worked so hard to get Charli to like him just for himself, but then he realized he couldn’t force it.” I recounted part of the storyTo See You, leaving out how the characters finally got their happily ever after.
I crossed the threshold into Hunnie’s and collapsed in my favorite velvet chair.
“Here,” she said, spinning around from the counter. With a spoon of honey in hand, she walked toward me. “What do you think?”
Taking the spoon, I tasted it with a lump in my throat and tears threatening to fall. Thankfully, Hunnie was as talkative as ever.
“Colleen said Cosette’s is booked solid for Thursday. I ran into her at the Kwikshop yesterday. Everyone wants watercolor nails like Bubble Bath from Essie, and some shade of pale blue and mint green, specifically.”
I smiled, but it didn’t feel as natural as it normally would. I’d ordered some nail polish samples for Colleen of pale watercolor shades but never imagined it would explode like it had. I didn’t think Colebury had ever seen a manicure revolution like this.
“Hey.” Hunnie stood directly in front of my chair, hovering over me.
“What?” I looked up, swallowing the tidal wave of emotion about to pour from me.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, still towering over me.
I waved her off. “Sit down. You’re making me nervous.”
Clearing my throat, I tried to channel the emotional stifling my mom had drilled into me, but there was nothing there. Even in my reserves.
“Ben ... it’s over,” I managed to choke out.
“What?”
