He practically lifted me and put me back in the driver’s seat of my mom’s car. His hand brushed gently over my cheek, moving a few damp strands of hair from my face.
“Good-bye, Jules.”
The door closed and the locks engaged, cutting through me like a knife.
Jules
For weeks, I dragged my tired ass around, pretending everything was A-OK. I became convinced if I didn’t let on about our relationship, Drew would come back. He’d see everything was fine and nice.
But, really, toast was nice. I was more like a burned piece of toast to be discarded. Garbage. Rubbish.
When I finally lay my head down on my pillow every night, I felt defeated.
I was the ultimate idiot. First, the victim of a stupid sex crime. Helpless and needy, to boot.
Then I’d fallen for the man in charge, my coach. He’d been the smart one to escape. And fast, at that.
After he left, three or four weeks passed where I barely slept at all. Eventually, my body became cloaked in pure exhaustion.
At least, I’d thought that’s what it was.
Then all of a sudden, sleep started coming easily to me. In class. In bed. In the Union Building.
That whole time, my only salvation was tennis. I took out my frustrations on the ball, beating the hell out of it, harder and harder.
“Turn it down a tiny bit, Juliette,” Coach Hall called to me. “We don’t need you killing Stacia during a practice. Add more precision and less animosity, Juliette. You’re going to tear the yellow right off the ball.”
I didn’t even bother to correct him on my name.
Jules had become reserved for Drew, and only Drew. I’d even put my greenJin the bottom of my underwear drawer. The way he’d licked around it, his tongue pushing it out of the way as he sucked on my neck ... he owned the damn necklace too. My mom had given it to me when I received my first tennis scholarship—the last time she’d really been proud of me.
“Jesus, girl, you look flushed,” Stacia said to me after our practice match. “Coach told you to slow it. I mean, I can take it, but holy shit, you’re on some sort of vendetta lately.”
“Just my competitive spirit,” I said before I guzzled some water.
“God, I can see your pulse racing in your neck. Sit down,” she ordered.
Quite frankly, I hated that she was taking an interest in me. It felt forced, even though it really wasn’t. It was just my past experiences rearing their ugly head. But honestly, it felt like my heart was going to gallop out of my chest, so I listened.
When I sat down, Lulu plopped down next to me.
“You good?” she asked.
“Yeah, I think I just went a little crazy out there.”
“I saw. I mean, are yougoodgood? Hilary said you were hanging out with Lamar a lot, and now no one sees you except for at practice and class. Something happen with him? I know you keep to yourself and all that, but if you need to talk ...”
When I laughed, water bubbled back up my throat. “No, nothing happened with Lamar.”
“Again, we’re here for you. I know you’re private, but if you need to talk, I can be discreet—”
“All good,” I said quickly, cutting her off. “I swear.” No one had ever been there for me before—until Drew—and look where that got me.
Taking another sip of water, I was surprised when it suddenly came back up faster than it went down, and I threw up all over my shoes.
Lulu stood up and took my hand. “I’m not arguing with you anymore, Jules. We’re going to the health center. You look like shit.”
Our fingers woven together, her feet leading the way—it was like soup for the soul. Until we got to the health center and they ran my labs.
