Rodion’s green eyes glimmer in the deviant way that usually gets my dick hard.
“She’s just some bitch we used to fuck, Z.” He spits out the words as though he actually means them. We both know he’s a liar. She was everything to us.
“Right,” I bite out. “Just some bitch.”
I can’t help but remember the way she’d whimper out my name right before she’d come. The moment she found her pleasure, she’d all but roar like a fucking lioness. My dick throbs with need in my slacks. I absently rub my palm against it.
Zahkar.
My name on her lips always sounded like music rather than a curse. I didn’t like hearing my name out loud before her, only if Rodion used it. I associated my name with death. With Rodion’s mother. But with her, it was something better. Something good.
Eighteen Years Ago…
It’s only been a few weeks since I was adopted. With her pitying smile, the lady at the children’s home called it unheard of for someone to want a boy of my age and background, whatever that meant. But here I am, in a house bigger than the malls back home in the US. It’s a world apart from the small, cramped room I shared with my older brother. This house is so big I can wander the halls and still not run into Rodion’s mom and dad for days. Rodion insists they are alsomymom and dad too now, but that doesn’t feel right. It’s strange to me, like trying to wear shoes that don’t fit.
My real mom and dad are dead.
Rodion’s parents are nice and all, but they can barely even look at me when I come down to join them all for dinner. There’s something sad about his mom, like she tries to smile, but it physically hurts her or something. I hear her crying in the home library most days. So, I don’t go in, but I need to get books from there to study. Andru says I must learn how to speak fluently in their language because it’s my home now. Even though they speak perfectly in mine.
I creep across the hallway carpet, which my toes sink into because it’s so thick. It’s so warm in this place that I don’t even need to wear socks. I slept in three pairs at my house to stop my toes from falling off.
As I reach the massive library door, a tight knot forms in my stomach, and a wave of nervousness washes over me, making all the tiny hairs on the back of my neck prickle. I’ve felt this way before–the dread.
Don’t go inside.
Don’t go inside.
Don’t go inside.
Despite the warning echoing in my mind, I find myself pushing open the heavy door and stepping into the study. It’s so quiet except for the tinkling of the chandelier. I’d never seen a light fixture like them before, like huge diamonds floating from the ceiling. Rodion told me what they’re called, said his mom loves them, and got them designed by someone famous. I wonder if that’s why she chose this one to hang herself from.
“No…No…” Andru’s voice bellows so loud from behind me, I cover my ears with my hands.
He runs into the room, crying and grabbing at her body to lift her, but she keeps slipping out of his arms. Her blonde hair sways, and that tinkling fills the room.
Tink.
Tink.
Tink.
Stepping forward, I reach to help, but his palm slams against my chest, and I hit a chair, landing with a thud, pain exploding up my back.
“Don’t touch her,” he roars, and I don’t understand why he’s saying that or if he’s even speaking to me. Nothing makes sense, apart from her being dead. I’m a curse. I should have never walked into this room. Into my house.
He manages to pull her down, and a soft thud hits the carpet. A cross falls from her hand.
Andru picks it up, tears running like water down his face.
He turns it over in his palm, reading something written on the back with her body splayed across his lap.
“Remember God,” he says, sobbing into her hair.
I don’t know what to do, so I get to my feet, limping a little when the pain is still pounding in my backside.
“Wait,” he suddenly says. “I’m sorry.”
I still my movements, staring at him.
