Her blonde, uneven hair whips across her face as she shakes her head. “Not without you.”
My chest heaves with an unrelenting storm of emotions—anger, confusion, guilt, sorrow, and betrayal swirling within me like a whirlwind.
“Please, Z, come inside,” she pleads, her voice trembling with desperation, and her vulnerability shatters my resolve. I turn on my heel and stride back into the house.
Rodion, hot on my heels, follows me into the living room. He attempts to touch me again, and my anger cracks. I rear a fist back and let it fly, connecting with his jaw. Alyona’s gasp makes my lungs constrict, but Rodion grins at me.
“It’s fine, love,” he tells her. “This is just how we do things.” He roams those green eyes over me. “Is that what you need, brother? A fight?”
His fist snaps out at me. Usually, I’d dodge the attack, but I don’t this time, allowing it to land across my cheek and throb into my teeth, relishing in the pain. My dick thickens against my zipper.
“Why keep it from me?” I ask, shoving at his chest and throwing a quick combo punch and then a kick to his gut. He folds his body, clutching his torso and laughs, blood blooming across his lips.
Rearing my knee up, I connect with his nose and blood bursts like a tap. His back hits the fireplace and knocks a vase over.
“Because you didn’t need to carry that, so I carried it for us both.” He pants shaking out his limbs and swiping at his nose. “You’re pulling your punches.”
“And you’re not throwing any,” I mock.
A fast kick comes toward me, hitting my thigh and then with a quick bend of the knee, he hits out again landing a kick to my arm and then the side of my head. The momentum throws my body weight to the side hitting the couch and almost toppling over it. Alyona’s image comes into my peripheral view. She’s standing at the threshold of the living room, her hand clutched across her mouth.
“It’s okay,krasota.”Beauty.
“I fucking love you. I would die for you,” Rodion says, sucking in oxygen as he swipes more blood from his lips. “You were never one of them, not to me. You have always been mine. Telling you about them would have only made you see yourself differently. Damaged.” He jabs a finger at me now, his own anger rising within him.
“But I am.” I laugh, the madness slipping through. “There’s something damaged and broken about both of us. There always has been. Our connection isn’t normal, Rodion. It’s incestuous, sinful, and built on the blood of us both losing people.” My blood rushes in my ears and my heart slams against my ribcage protesting what I’m saying.
“It might not be normal, but it’s ours, Z. We found each other at the darkest time of our lives and bleed light into each other. You saved me,” he breathes, his hair falling across his brow. “I don’t give a shit what people call it, or how wrong or broken you think we are. I’ve never doubted the way I feel about you.”
A tide of emotion washes over me with the weight of his words, everything we’ve been through together, how many times he’s picked me up when I didn’t think I could do it on my own. The nights I held him and made him laugh to distract him from those nightmares. The life we built together. There’s not another soul on this damn earth who understands me, loves me so unapologetically as he does.
“Do you doubt how you feel about me?” he asks, pain lacing his words.
No.
No.
Fuck no.
Nothing this pure can be wrong. Even if we’re broken, I don’t want to mend. Our shared history is steeped in blood and darkness, and our lives were intricately woven together by scars and sorrow. Even so, I wouldn’t change any of it if it means I get him. Fate brought us together, but love kept us together.
“I fucking love you, asshole, and I know you love me,” he says, pointing up at his nose. “I wouldn’t let anyone else ruin this pretty face.”
Nothing could ruin his face.
“I love you,” he says again, taking a step closer and my heart pounds. “I love you.”
Closer.
“I love you.”
I crash into him, my lips claiming, our bodies entwining as we fall to the floor with a thud. Alyona disappears and I’m faintly aware of feet going up the stairs as Rodion palms my dick.
We tear at each other, raw and primal, shredding clothes, until we’re skin to skin. We fight for dominance. I pin him and take bites from his flesh, tasting the salty twang of his skin against my tongue and grinding my dick against his, fisting his hair. Then we’re rolling and he pins me, tasting down my body, owning, claiming, loving. His mouth sucks down my length until I hit the back of his throat. A hiss escapes my lips, and my back arches off the floor. He sucks and slurps down my dick like it’s the first time he’s ever tasted me. Saliva and blood mix, coating our bodies. Pushing him away, he sits back on his knees, his chest heaving with his labored breathing.
“Don’t tease,” he warns.
“Bend over the fucking table,” I order him, and his eyes flash with fight, his pupils blown wide.
