"I don't feel well," I said through gritted teeth.
"Hangover? Or is it something else?"
I balled my hands inside the sleeves of my cardigan and gave a pathetic shake of my head like I was a sickly Victorian child. "I don't use enough recreational drugs to know whether it's from the ecstasy or just something I ate. My stomach can be really sensitive and flare up over random things, especially—" I flapped my hands near the sides of my head meant to round upall of this."Greasy eggs will definitely make it worse."
"Okay, no grease. Understood. Probably no salsa, right? What about other veggies? And how about cheese? Is that okay?"
For no good reason at all, I wanted to argue with him. Tell him he couldn't just take my oatmeal and force scrambled eggsupon me. That I was the one who got me through the worst of it. That even when I was married, I'd lived on my own, without anyone looking after me, and I didn't need him to start now.
The notion of someone helping me, even in this small way, was so foreign that it felt like an attack. And that made me want to cry.
"If you don't tell me, I'll order both and eat whatever you don't."
I gulped down a fresh blast of emotion. It was ridiculous to have a reaction like this toa breakfast order. I could let him do this for me. I could let him help, even if I had to put myself in a mental straitjacket to do it. It wouldn't hurt me and I wouldn't come out of this owing him anything.
"No cheese. No veggies. Just plain." When he lifted a brow, I added, "In a tortilla."
He pushed to his feet, saying, "You got it, Saunders."
As he skirted the table, he kissed the top of my head and twisted a hand down my ponytail, and I didn't feel so much like a ghost anymore.
chapter thirty-four
Audrey
Today's vocabulary word: aura
The engagement partywas exactly what I would expect from Janet and Rita. A homey backyard potluck with mismatched folding chairs and a cutesy signature cocktail—prickly pear margaritas for thepairof honor. Twinkle lights everywhere. A photo slideshow playing on the TV—though all the pics were from the past few days. Every surface in the kitchen was crammed with crockpots while Gary manned the grill out back.
The patio was packed with a fascinating mix of folks, more than this place should've been able to contain, but somehow it worked. There was no hope of remembering everyone's names but I forgave myself for that early. It wasn't like I'd be back here for the holidays.
Right from the start, Jude was committed to performing the shit out of this relationship. We'd planned as much earlier though I hadn't expected him to overachieve like this. Between gluing a hand to the small of my back the minute we stepped out of the car to droppingfiancéeinto every conversation like he'd bought the word and intended to get his money's worth, itbecame clear he had no intention of half-assing this. Full-asses, all the way.
Which was great. Really, it was. I didn't have to carry this entire engagement on my shoulders or even do the heavy lifting to keep the conversation going. A huge improvement over that dinner with Janet and Gary the other day.
But the problem was that I didn't know where the act ended and reality rushed back in. I didn't know what to do with my brain's insistence on grabbing every tender word he said about me and stowing it away like it meant something. Or how to handle my body's reaction to him stroking a thumb over my hip while telling Janet's friend Irena a story from high school.
"Audrey danced the lead inGisellethat season," he said, oblivious to the high beam situation he'd created with my nipples, "but it opened the same night as our spring formal. We hopped on my bike and left right after the curtain fell. She didn't even change out of her costume."
"It was a cute dress," I said. "Perfect for twirling. The costume manager just about killed me for it though."
"I remember the twirling," he said, laughing.
"That's badass," Irena said, giving us a slow, appraising nod. "Has anyone ever told you two that you have some truly enchanting aura energies? The way you blend is mesmerizing."
We shifted to exchange a glance. He arched a brow though I knew from the twitch of his lips he was fighting off a laugh. Not one for auras, not when he could have precise, tangible things like engines and gears. But, still staring at me, he asked, "What does that mean?"
"Might not mean anything. Most folks find themselves a good aura match but the way you complement and contrast is almost perfect. Not so common." She shrugged. "You probably have a lot of fun together."
Jude grinned at me. "You wouldn't believe some of our stories just from this week."
"Jude captured a dragon-lizard," I said.
"Audrey danced with an entire rodeo roster," he added.
"It wasn't theentireroster," I said.
He squeezed my hip, his fingers sliding firmly into underwear territory. And he knew that because he kept tracing the band of my panties. "Close enough."
