He glanced up, surprise registering in his eyes when he caught me staring.
The doors started to close at my back. Since I’d already pulled one disappearing act today, and running out of the elevator seemed like a level of drama I wasn’t ready to embrace for myself, I gave him a quick nod and devoted all my attention to pressing the button for my floor.
I stayed there, staring at the panel like I’d incinerate if I allowed my gaze to wander anywhere else, until the doors opened on the next level and a flood of people boarded. An entire resident cohort or two, some med students, and one of the many attendings who really liked the sound of his own voice. He was deep into recounting a story and paid me no attention.
I tucked myself into the side wall, my arms crossed and my gaze on the floor to minimize any chance of accidental eye contact. When the doors opened on the next level, several morepeople crowded in. A pair of nurses edged in front of me, sending me back a few steps until I felt the heat of the person behind me.
“Easy there,” Henry whispered.
He closed one hand around my elbow as the other landed on my hip, his fingers sliding just inside my pocket. I hoped against all things that he didn’t notice the shaky breath I sucked in. The attending was still going on with his story and the nurses in front of me were comparing notes on who had the worst staffing situation today. No one was paying attention to us.
I made an attempt at shuffling forward to put a wisp of distance between us, but the nurses in front of me turned to face each other, forcing me flush against the hard slab of Henry’s chest, my head under his chin. His hands flexed, holding me tight for a moment before I felt a rough exhale on my neck.
It took nothing at all to remember the feel of him behind me like this, the low, growly sounds he made and the way he held me like he’d never let go.
And it took everything to remember that we weren’t those people anymore.
My shoulders hitched up as I pulled in another wobbly breath. “Dr. Hazlette?—”
“I know,” he said on a sigh. “I know.”
The elevator stopped again and a few people exited, but neither of us moved. His hand stayed on my arm and I didn’t step out of his orbit. I’d long forgotten which floor I was heading to and why I was due there. I’d tuned out the incessant buzz of my phone. Everything save for the press of his fingers into my skin and the solid heat of his chest on my back ceased to matter.
The resident cohort with the talky attending got off on the next level, and just as the doors came together I realized we were alone. The elevator jolted as it rose and that was enough to snap me back to reality. I bolted to the other side of the car in twolong strides and glanced over at Henry while I straightened my sleeves.
“That can’t happen again,” I said.
He crossed his arms over his chest. As if I needed to watch those forearm muscles rippling in real time. “I am aware.”
I ran a hand down my arm, desperate to smooth the wrinkles at my elbow. “I’m sorry if I gave you the impression that I was interested— That I wanted?—”
“Believe me,” he said, his voice low and quiet, “I know what you want.”
“And yet we continue to find ourselves in situations where you seem determined to test that theory.” I couldn’t stop touching my sleeve.Out, damned spot.“It can’t happen again.”
The doors opened once more, and for the second time today, I walked away from Henry as if that would solve anything.
Seven
Henry
Transplant Surgery Rotation:
Day 4, Week 1
It was freezingin the auditorium. If I didn’t know better, I’d assume I made a wrong turn and stumbled into the morgue. They never could find a consistent temperature for this place, which was irritating since I was down here every other day.
It was a good thing that my little sister-slash-adoptive mother Cami had insisted I run halfway across the hospital complex to grab my fleece zip-up for this week’s morbidity and mortality conference. Not that I was going to tell her that. Cami was amazing, sister-mother for life, but she was right about everything all the time and I was legally obligated to keep her humble by any means necessary.
I spotted Tori in one of the back rows, kneeling on her seat. “We couldn’t find anything together,” she called. “Reza went down front and Cami’s somewhere on the right side.”
“No worries. We’ll regroup back in the clinic.”
“Watch out for yourself in here,” she replied with a pointed look at the residents seated beside her. “Everyone’s a little feral this morning.”
I dropped my hands to my hips. I had at least a hundred pounds on Tori plus enough height to make a difference, and my background could be loosely described asmedical MacGyver shit. “I think I’ll be okay.”
She tossed up her hands. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
