A thunderous crash sounded overhead and Parker swore loudly.
“Maybe the question isn’tcan you drivebutcan I ignore my responsibilities at your place tonight?”
“I mean…” My body was cooking up some big, spicy ideas, and if the throbbing erection pressed against my belly was any indication, I wasn’t alone in that. I tipped my head back to get a look at him. I found him staring at me, smiling. It was so strange to see anything other than a deep scowl on his face.
That smile faded when Parker called, “Beck? Are you there? Hello? Is our reality nothing more than a simulation? Or is it our consciousness experiencing reality after it’s occurred?” He paused to empty his stomach again. “Or is our perception of reality nothing more than that—our perception of one iteration of the world? And billions of other universes existing all at once, separately, and rarely—but not never—glimpsing each other?”
He kissed my forehead. Who would’ve guessed Beckett Loew was a forehead kisser? In all of Parker’s billions of universes, I wouldn’t have tagged that. Even now, with his lips on my skin, I wasn’t sure this was real. I wasn’t sure it wouldn’t end in the blink of an eye.
“What time will you be in tomorrow?” he asked.
“Later. Two-ish.” I had the overwhelming urge to lick his neck. Just get right in there and taste him.
He nodded. “I’ll walk you out.” His gaze dropped to my chest like he had a similar idea. Instead, he banded his arms around me and held me in a way that felt like a promise. Like he wanted to infuse words into my skin and keep them there.
I really wanted to hear those words.
The shower turned on upstairs and Beckett called, “Try not to drown yourself. That would really fuck up the simulation.”
“I don’t have a ton of experience with people getting rocked off their asses on shrooms but I can’t imagine it’s a good idea to add to the existential paranoia,” I said. “It’s bound to backfire on you.”
“Lance experimented with everything in college, and I fucked with him the entire time,” he said, still holding me tight. “He turned out fine.”
Ah. There it is.We were never far from a reminder of Lance and his role in this thing Beck and I had going. “That truly is debatable.”
He murmured in agreement. “I guess you’re right.”
“Whatdid you just say? Isn’t it against your religion to allow me to be right at any point in time ever?” I looked around the hallway. “Will lightning strike you down?”
“You’re funny, storm cloud. Real fuckin’ funny.” He ran a hand down my spine. “You’re not wearing a bra—”
“Why would I torture myself that way?”
“—and that’s doingterriblethings to me.”
“Oh, please. It’s not like I have enough going on for it to matter.”
“It matters to me. Everything you do matters to me, in case you haven’t noticed.” He skimmed a hand up my flank and drew his thumb along the underside of my breast. I tried and failed to withhold a soft gasp. “And believe me when I say Ilovewhat you have going on.”
I brushed my fingers over a wavy lock of hair that’d fallen to his forehead. “Everything I do drives you crazy.”
“Once again, you’re right.” He squeezed my backside like he wanted to leave his fingerprints behind. “If you have any real intention of going home tonight, I suggest you do it now. I’m about thirty seconds away from keeping you.”
“And what exactly does that—”
“Beck? What do I do if I puke in the shower?”
A laugh snorted out of me as Beck groaned into my hair.
“I should’ve made him sleep outside.” After drawing a deep breath, Beck stepped back and laced his hands behind his neck. “Come on. I’m walking you out.”
Jem and Scout led the way to my Jeep, and Beck kept his distance while I ushered them into the back seat. He walked around to the driver’s side with me, that stiff, scowly expression fixed on his face like always.
“Good luck in there,” I said, tapping my keys against my palm.
He arched a brow and stared at me as if I’d said the most idiotic thing in the world. Then he rolled his eyes and grabbed my hand, saying, “For fuck’s sake, Sunny. Get over here.”
My head bumped against the window as he kissed me but I didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Even if everything was different tomorrow and we never managed to get back to this strange, messed-up night where we were perfect together for a few perfect minutes. Even if he sat me down to explain that we were in different places and it would never work and what about Lance? Even if I woke up and remembered I was hot garbage when it came to sex and romantic relationships, and I didn’t want that stress in my life right now.
