Sunny:I think you’re a bit worse. It’s like you can’t help but revert to being that heartless bully who traumatized me as a kid.
Beckett:I think “traumatized” is an exaggeration.
Sunny:Must I remind you of the My Little Pony incident?
Beckett:Fuck, I haven’t thought about that in a million years.
Sunny:Funny, I think about it every time I drive past the Castros’ stables.
Beckett:We were deranged. That’s all I can say.
Sunny:You’re still deranged.
Beckett:I believe that’s another of your exaggerations.
Sunny:You just floated the idea of firing your entire staff because I said one person ignored my personal space boundaries and let’s not forget how you tried to buy my café out from under me.
Beckett:I never said my approach was conventional and you’d be better off waiting for a bus at this hour than an apology.
Sunny:You were not only not nice to me when we were kids but you were actively hurtful. You and Lance were horrible that summer when I had to wear the helmet because of that super tiny skull fracture.
Beckett:Oh my god.
Beckett:Yeah. Shit. We were horrible.
Beckett:There’s no excuse.
Sunny:Now you’re getting it.
Beckett:Is that why you go thermonuclear every time I open my mouth?
Sunny:It usually has something to do with the noise coming out of your mouth but yeah, the history doesn’t help.
Beckett:To be fair to our deranged, pathetic, hormone-addled minds, you did attach doll hair to that helmet and insist it was your real hair. We were helpless.
Sunny:You used my head as a Nerf gun target.
Beckett:What are you talking about?
Sunny:You guys would hide upstairs and shoot at me whenever I went out in the backyard. And that was the only place I was allowed to go that summer when my parents were at work. Because of the skull fracture.
Beckett:Shit.
Beckett:Would it help if I apologized?
Sunny:We’ve already established that you have no interest in apologizing so let’s not pretend this gesture would be anything other than an end to the conversation.
Beckett:I’m not going to apologize for wanting to get rid of someone who, as you stated, can’t respect personal space. We’ve been over the matter of buying your building backward and forward. Let’s be done with that, please.
Sunny:I can’t promise I won’t bring it up again in the future because it was an expert-level dick move but yeah, sure, we can be done with it.
Beckett:I’d like to apologize for the inexcusable things I did all those years ago.
Sunny:When you say you’d like to apologize, I assume that means the maintenance crew will be out bright and early tomorrow?
Beckett:It means that if I could go back and punch my teenage self in the teeth, I would. I am sorry.
Sunny:Did you really like the cookies or was that a mistake too?
