The problem was that I couldn’t fix what was broken because it wasn’t possible. I couldn’t put these pieces back together and go forward when forward placed us on two different continents. There was no way I could stay here. I couldn’t see how that would work. And there was no way I could ask Sunny to give up her whole life here to come with me. She’djustopened a business here in Friendship. The last thing she was going to do was pick up and leave just because I liked the life I’d built for myself overseas.
Sure, I didn’t have any real roots outside of this town and my career wasn’t everything, but Ilikedmy lifestyle. It worked for me—and Sunny would hate it. She’d find a community and people and make a home for herself in Singapore, and then I’d be sent to UAE or Monaco or back to London and she’d have to do that all over again. And then again six months, a year later.
And what had she said about being a small-town girl at heart? She didn’t want to live in any of the places I’d end up. She didn’t want an executive penthouse at the top of the newest high-rise and she didn’t want to hang around with a bunch of private wealth managers who entertained themselves by ordering the most expensive bottles of everything and playing credit card roulette at the end of the night. She wantedthisplace andthiscommunity, and her café and her friends. She wanted festivals dedicated tocornandasparagus. She wanted Friendship, and she wanted it more than she wanted me.
That realization hit me like a punch that plowed through my gut and grabbed my spine, and then yanked it out my belly button. I couldn’t think past it. I couldn’t function. Couldn’t bring myself to care about anything else.
So, there I was, flat on my childhood bed, heart pounding in a way that didn’t seem healthy, staring down the fact that I was going to lose the one person who’d come to matter more than anyone, anything else in this whole fucking world—and all because I didn’t know how to get over my issues with this strange little square of earth.
That was it.
That was my bottom line. I had issues with this place and they were standing in the way of everything I’d ever wanted and never believed I could have.
It wasn’t just that she mattered. A lot of people mattered to me. But Sunny…Sunny wasmine.
But only for now.
That was when I’d decided to start some laundry, but on the way up from the basement I noticed the backyard grass was nearly knee-high so I mowed the lawn. But mowing the lawn required me to climb over some very old, very rusty paint cans, and rather than get myself into a situation that would necessitate a tetanus shot in the middle of the night, I loaded them into my car to take to the local recycling center.
When it opened.
Once I had the lawn clippings bagged, I went room to room with a trash bag, gathering all of Parker’s forgotten iced coffee cups and protein bar wrappers, and all of this eventually led me to cleaning out the fridge. When I found two dozen eggs, I did the only reasonable thing and made some scrambled eggs. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d eaten and it seemed like a fine solution but then I noticed a trail of dried grass and dirt tracking from the kitchen door all the way through the first floor and leading up the stairs to Parker’s room, which was why I needed to ruin his life by vacuuming.
Since I wasn’t allowed in the house and neither Singapore nor Sunny were in the cards today, I nodded my way through a call with Adrian that should’ve had me praising the heavens and then I went to the gym. I hadn’t been intentional about exercising since returning to Friendship, not nearly as religious as I was when my life wasn’t a runaway train, so it shouldn’t have been a surprise that I overworked every muscle group and left with hands shaking too hard to hold my phone steady.
From that pain came the clear-as-dawn realization that I needed to speak to Sunny. I didn’t know what I’d say or how it would be any different from all the other things I’d already said but I knew I couldn’t go on this way. I couldn’t live in the murky limbo ofthis can’t continueandwhat if it does?I needed Sunny and the rest of it—well, I was damn good at solving problems. I could solve this one too, even if I didn’t know how I’d do it yet.
Once I was washed and dressed, I drove straight to Naked. I knew Sunny was on the schedule this morning and I was fairly confident she’d talk to me. If she didn’t, I’d park myself at a table and wait until she was ready.
Except this plan went down harder than theEdmund Fitzgeraldwhen Meara shook her head, saying, “Sunny isn’t in today.”
“But—why?” I ran my hands over the butcher block counter. “She’s supposed to be here.”
Meara gave me a sympathetic nod. Did she know about all of this? Did she know Sunny had sent me on a suicide mission? “Yeah, she was supposed to be in today but she’s not feeling great and—”
“What’s wrong?” I patted all of my pockets in search of my keys. I found them in my hand. “Is it her arm? The concussion? Aura symptoms?”
“I’m not sure, sweet pea, but it sounds like she just needs a low-key day.”
“She shouldn’t be alone,” I said, more to myself than Meara. “I’m going—”
“Wait!” She pinched my shirt between her fingers, drew me across the counter. “You look like you’ve been through the spin cycle, sir, and I’m not letting you go anywhere until you pull yourself together.”
“I don’t want her to be alone.” My gaze bored into hers, begging her to recognize that, while I respected her and her position, I wasn’t backing down on this one. “Meara. I’m going.”
“Not right now you’re not,” she said, her gaze just as solid as mine. “The last thing our girl needs is you running over there, raggedy as all hell and strung out on more stress than a boy with your bank account should be allowed to experience. You’re going to sit your ass down, put some food in your belly, and hydrate until you stop looking like dried seaweed. Do you understand me?”
My jaw clicked as I stared her down. I’d accomplished more in my life with this stare than any collection of words. I knew what I was doing here.
“Oh, you think you can intimidate me?” Her laugh had a lot in common with fairy-tale villains. “Sweet pea, I havetwoof you at home.” She released my shirt and pushed me backward with one finger. “How do you take your coffee?”
“I’ve got it,” Beth called from somewhere behind the counter.
“Good,” Meara said, crossing her arms over her chest. “Go sit down.”
My quadsscreamedat me as I dropped into a seat and it must’ve been all over my face because Beth asked, “Have you been stabbed? Are we missing some key points from this story?” She set the coffee down and motioned to the scrapes on my forearms, which were an unexpected product of mowing behind the garage. I didn’t know what the fuck was growing back there but it had teeth. “Who did this to you? Want me to beat them up?”
“All me,” I grumbled. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”
