"Regardless of my previous comments on the matter, you're expecting me to confess I hate it," I murmured. "That I prefer the clean structure of the Valley."
"And all its tightly branded bullshit? Yeah. I am anticipating that."
Instead of answering him, I asked, "What did you think of this evening's gathering?"
Frowning down at his palms, he replied, "I enjoyed it in spite of my expectations."
"Meaning what, exactly?"
"Meaning this isn't the norm for either of us," he replied. "You like your clean structure and I like my wide open spaces, and somehow both of us enjoyed that meal of chaos."
"It wasn'tchaos," I argued. "It was emblematic of a different phase of life, one where animals and tiny humans are as relevant as the adults and their endeavors."
"Do you like that phase of life?" he asked. "The one with animals and—what did you call them?—tiny humans?"
I barked out a laugh. "I'm very happy for people who choose to bring children into the world and commit to raising them in loving families. My sister Talbia has two children," I added, almost an afterthought. "A boy and girl. They're young, four and six, if my memory serves. She adores them. She was meant to be a mother. She's a good daughter, as well. My parents live with her and her husband. She has what it takes to do those things and she's remarkably successful. The desire to nurture is not one I share."
"Isn't it, though?" he asked. "You gather up helpless creatures to save them from themselves. They aren't infants or the elderly, but you nurture them just the same, sparrow."
I glared at him. "You wouldn't say that to a male chief of staff."
"Probably not," he admitted. "But I only said it because you suggested your sister is the successful sibling based on her capacity for keeping her children and your parents tended."
"Sheisthe successful one," I replied.
Behind me, Gus snickered. "You are fascinating, Miz Malik. Paid in gold bars, traveling on private jets, and debating measures of success."
"In her way, she is phenomenally successful. My life isn't meaningful and valuable because I earn a good living"—another snicker—"or travel comfortably. And her life doesn't lack meaning because her days are spent caring for her husband, her children, our parents. But I do know I wouldn't have the same success if I tried my hand at living her life."
"I'm sure you'd make a fine mother," he said.
"Don't do that. Don't patronize me," I replied. "Whenever a woman announces she isn't interested in motherhood, everyone jumps to convince her it's worth it, she'd be a natural, she'll regret missing out on her childbearing years when she's older. That doesn't account for the truth that some women aren't cut out for the task and others simply do not want the job."
"And you don't," he added.
I shook my head once. "I don't think I do, no."
"I respect that." With a nod, Gus tossed his rag to the floor and reached for my waist. "I know you said you wanted to keep it chill around your boss," he started, his lips on the back of my neck, "but, earlier…when we…youdidn't—"
"I'm all right," I said, laughing. Talk about conversational whiplash. "There's no scorecard."
He tugged off his shirt, threw it in the same direction as his rag. "Maybe not but I believe in equality."
I eyed him in the mirror, my lips quirking up. "Do you?"
"Indeed. It's one of my top concerns. I don't believe you can be quiet, however. That's my secondary concern."
"What, may I ask, is your proposed solution?"
He shuffled toward the window, bending at the waist to peer out into the darkness. "I propose we take a stroll down the dock." He stood, glancing around the room before yanking a plaid wool blanket off the foot of the bed. "And we're taking this with us. I can handle my share of bug bites but splinters in my ass are a different story."
Chapter Ten
Gus
Tenebrism:a technique employing extreme contrasts of light and dark used to increase emotion and drama.
On our lastday in Talbott's Cove, I woke up with the dawn. Neera was still asleep. I shifted toward her, wrapping my arms around her waist. I wanted to hold her close and savor this moment before it ended. I wasn't ready for the end, not in the least. I didn't even want to leave the bed because I knew every step away from this location was a step closer to the conclusion of us.
