He glanced up, met my gaze. "Yeah," he answered. "That's why I climbed the tree. I was trying to find something real." He paused, gifting me a warm grin. "And I did. I found you."
"I believeIfoundyou," I replied. "How can I help you—what was it?—wander? How can I help you wander, Gus?" When he only blinked at me, I continued. "You might boil my last drops of patience, but I still want to help you succeed. Helping other people do their best work ismybest work."
That grin morphed into a deep, full smile. "Wandering can't be helped," he replied. "Back home, I'd follow the land, the trees, the rivers and streams. I didn't plan where I was going or what I wanted to see. No goals, no structure. No thinking more than a few steps ahead. Definitely not management coaching."
"That sounds…" My voice trailed off as I searched for the proper description.
"Wonderful?" he supplied.
"Overwhelming," I replied.
"Not when you do it right." He knocked his knuckles against his sketchbook. "I can't do this without also doing that."
"I think I understand the origin of this conflict," I said. "You really do need to wander."
"Do you wander, Miz Malik?" he asked.
I glanced down at the sketchbook and then back up at Gus. "Not as often as I might like."
He gestured around the cabin. "What in the world is stopping you?"
"Having a private jet at my disposal doesn't mean I have the luxury of wandering whenever I wish," I replied. "My time is not my own."
He cocked his head to the side, his brow wrinkling as he asked, "When was the last time it was yours?"
I clasped my free hand around my phone. "I haven't slowed down in an age. That's the pace of things. It's an arms race."
He leaned over, pried my fingers from the device. Set it aside, just beyond my reach. "No, it isn't."
"I understand that's your view of the matter, but as someone who has lived in this world for—"
"Too long?" he asked. He gathered my hands between his, squeezing just a bit. "Too long without a break? What would happen if you gave yourself time to wander, Neera? Even if only for"—his shoulders lifted as he grinned at me—"this weekend?"
Yes, that was exactly what I was hoping to discover.
He traced the inside of my wrist, much as he had last night at the eatery. I felt the same intensity from him—fromme—as last night. The power, the freedom, the courage, whatever it was, it was back. "Have you ever done anything like that? Like last night? Anything in public?"
I couldn't justify my need to know. Not in a manner that made sense. Gus was aware of the lines I'd crossed but he hadn't matched my confession with one of his own. And I needed it. I had to put this thing—this experience—into a quantifiable structure. I had to know what was happening, even while I knew it would flash and cool.
"Before last night, no. But I'm more than happy to be your accomplice." He dipped his head to meet my eyes before glancing to the back of the cabin. "Are you looking for an accomplice right now? Here?"
I followed his gaze to the nook where the flight attendant sat, her legs crossed and her iPad balanced on her thigh. I tossed the idea of her finding me in Gus's lap or with his hand up my skirt around my mind. It didn't zip through me like lightning, didn't quicken my pulse. "No. Not here." I gave him a disappointed frown. "It's not my plane. Doesn't feel good."
He barked out a laugh. "And if it was?"
"Then I might have a different mind about it," I replied. "There are other issues, but that's on the top of my list."
Seemingly content with that explanation, Gus lifted my hand to his lips and kissed my palm. Then, he popped the next two buttons on my blouse. "There. That's better," he murmured.
By my standards, this was indecent and unprofessional. By modern fashion standards, it was merely risqué.
And yet, I'd enjoyed sex in public places yesterday.
The brain was a complicated organ.
Gus asked, "Now that we have those matters settled, what should I expect from Maine?"
I was prepared to describe Cole and his husband Owen, the charming town where they made their home, and the routine of my monthly visits with them, but I stopped myself. "I believe you'll be able to wander."
