I didn't know how it felt to be wanted and I didn't know how I'd handle it if I ever found out.
Chapter Three
Dating App Guy 2: Yummy.
Magnolia: …?
Guy Dating App Guy 2: You're delicious.
Magnolia: Thank you. I think…
Guy Dating App Guy 2: I'd eat your ass and cunt.
Guy Dating App Guy 2: Eat them like fuckin Thanksgiving.
{ blocked }
* * *
Dating App Guy 3: Hey what's up?
Magnolia: Not much. You?
Dating App Guy 3: Just chillin and trying to find a pretty lady.
Magnolia: Good luck with that.
Dating App Guy 3: Don't need luck. You're pretty and I found you.
Magnolia: There you go!
Dating App Guy 3: I have a boner.
Magnolia: Good luck with that too!
{ blocked }
* * *
Dating App Guy 4: Something about you just makes me think you'd give the world's best blow jobs.
Dating App Guy 4: If there was a contest for best head, you'd win.
Dating App Guy 4: You'd get the grand prize.
Magnolia: Yeah? What's the prize?
Dating App Guy 4: A pearl necklace.
{ blocked }
Chapter Four
My date wason his fourth cup of coffee in forty minutes.
It wasn't even iced coffee. That I could understand. Not that I'd ever chugged four cups, but I could knock back a large iced caramel macchiato under the right circumstances. But hot coffee? No, sir. It took me forty minutes and an ice cube tosiphot coffee.
But this guy was a devotee of the Church of House Blend Hot and Sweet. He'd scooped a handful of Splenda packets from the courtesy bin after the barista announced our orders. Not a few packets but an actual handful of them. He then proceeded to deposit them on the center of the table we chose on the Boylston Street side of the shop. I'd ignored the small mountain of fake sugar then but now it seemed he meant to consume the entire quantity.
