I pressedthe phone to my chest and laughed for a solid minute.
Annette: So many questions but let's start with this: why were you awake and watching the streets at 4:30 in the morning?
Brooke: Because I'm a muthafuckin' beast?
Annette: Yes, but also…?
Brooke: Hong Kong's market closes at 4 a.m. EST. Singapore at 5.
Annette: Oh, right. I don't understand how you keep those hours.
Brooke: Funny story because it seems like YOU keep those hours, too.
Annette: It was just the one time and it won't happen again.
Brooke: Wait a hot second. Why isn't it happening again? It should definitely happen again!
Brooke: Also it would be wonderful to grab some details like who, where, how it was, length and girth. The basics.
Annette: Because I wasn't being smart. I made some bad decisions.
Brooke: Was it bad-bad decisions or bad-very good decisions?
Brooke: No, don't answer. Just tell me the damn story before I get an eye twitch.
The oven timertrilled and I abandoned my phone to collect my little pies. Dark purply-blue liquid bubbled up between the crust's lattice lines and the scent of sweetness filled the air. I'd prepared a small batch this time and they were just for Jackson.
When I had them seated on the cooling rack, I returned to the sofa and Brooke.
Annette: Sorry about that. I had to take some pies out of the oven.
Brooke: How the holy fuck are you baking in this weather? Dad's house has central air conditioning and I'm still sweating like Whitney Houston on stage. I have to wear a bra just to keep the tit sweat under control.
Annette: There is such a thing as oversharing, dearie.
Annette: I have a breeze off the water. It's not much, but it helps.
Brooke: Back to the story and make it snappy, please. I'm due for my two hours of sleep soon.
Annette: I got drunk at The Galley, Sheriff Lau took me home, I stripped in his living room and did rude things to him, and then passed out in his bed.
Brooke: YOU FUCKED LAU?!?
Brooke: Well done. I knew we'd make a hunter out of you.
Annette: I didn't fuck him. I was really drunk and really stupid, and I kissed him. And then I spanked him.
Brooke: I'm going to need some time to process this information.
Brooke: Processing finished. Tell me about his cock. It's huge, right? It's gotta be.
Annette: I was the only one naked, but based upon certain interactions, yeah, I'd say it's huge.
Brooke: YESSSSS. So, what's next? When are you seeing him again? I need this kind of live action drama in my life.
Annette: I don't know. He's so polite and respectful, it makes my teeth hurt. He wouldn't fuck me when I was drunk, and when I saw him tonight he made it clear he wasn't going to fuck me until I had my head on straight. Which it is not. So it's probably a good thing I didn't go there with him.
Brooke: You saw him tonight?!? You saw him tonight. Of course. Go ahead and live your life without informing me. It's fine. I'm fine. Whatever. I'll just drown myself in rosé and mashed potatoes. IT'S FINE.
