Riley:Honestly, he's fine. He doesn't listen to half of what I say.
Nick:WHAT DID YOU SAY
Riley:Nothing
Riley:He just mentioned that Erin was flying in for the holiday
Riley:Which was news to me
Riley:Perhaps you two could loop me in, you know? It's easier to keep a lid on the shit when it's not flying at me blind. I don't appreciate getting my news from Matt.
Nick:…and?
Riley:And I offered some humorous commentary along the lines of him keeping an eye on you
Nick:Oh. Awesome. Thanks for that.
Riley:I was joking!
Nick:Yeah, well, he took it seriously enough to ask if there was something he needed to know
Nick:And it was five in the fucking morning so no, I didn't handle that one well at all
Riley:Sorry man. My bad.
Riley:For what it's worth, he always assumes the best.
Riley:It's really fucking annoying
Nick:Are you all good?
Riley:You mean, am I still in love with my brother's wife? Because yeah. I am.
Riley:Nothing new on that front. Same shit, different day.
Nick:You need to get laid. Get under someone and get over her.
Riley:Tried. Failed.
Nick:…failed? Do you need a urology referral?
Riley:Shut the fuck up
Riley:It was a good time for all involved until I called her Lauren.
Riley:And not, like, over dinner. On the precipice of a rather pivotal moment.
Nick:Don't tell me you called her Lauren during
Riley:Fuck yes during
Nick:Shit
Nick:Dude…
Riley:Yeah, you really don't have to explain to me how fucked up that is. I get it.
Nick:What did she do?
