He glared at her with the barest level of civility. “Yes?”
She chided herself without mercy. She hated apologizing, but he deserved it. “I am sorry I offended you. That was not my intent.”
“Indeed, it was your intent, Sophie. Pray, do not further insult me by feigning otherwise and expecting me to accept it.” He dismissed her with a frustrated shake of his head and shiftedhis focus to something outside the window. The resentment in his tone made the scolding sting even more.
She had earned that dressing-down, and now needed to find a way to make amends.
The sunlight streaming in brought out the coppery hues in the autumnal gold of his stylishly cropped hair and enhanced the strong, angular cut of his jaw. The man had aged so well. Too well. His youthful softness of ten years ago had become the captivating hardness of the present. He was breathtaking in military dress, resplendent with gold braid and medals, his sword, and highly polished Hessians.
She clasped her hands in her lap, fighting not to work her fingers and make her knuckles pop. She could not condemn him for his irritation. After all, she deserved it. What was it he always said?Might as well make the best of things?How might she make the best of this? She leaned forward and peered at the palace’s doorway. Perhaps if she changed the subject, his ruffled feathers might slowly smooth back down. “Should we go back inside and see if everything is all right?”
“No.”
A frustrated huff slipped free of her before she could stop it.
He tore his glare from the window and locked eyes with her. “Forgive me. No,my lady.”
“That is not why I huffed. I am frustrated because I allowed my foolish emotions to take control of my tongue for a mere second, and now we are at odds even though you have been nothing but thoughtful and kind to me since our reunion.” The longer she thought about the entire situation, the more overset she became. “But you must admit, it is only natural for me to believe that the primary reason you are being so infuriatingly pleasant is that, in a short time, you will ascend to the aristocracy as an earl. Quite the feat for a knight. Would you not agree?”
He stared at her, slowly narrowing his eyes as if homing in on his prey. His anger made his glare even frostier.
“Well, why else would you be so happy today?” she asked when he remained silent.In for a penny, in for a pound.“It is certainly not because you are thrilled to be my husband. You rarely noticed me when we were younger, and when you did, it was only to be mean and try to shoo me away. You yourself admitted you found me dreadfully annoying.”
“Why can you not let go of the past? We are no longer those two people.”
“You hurt me.”
“And I have apologized. Repeatedly,” he growled. “What more can I do? I cannot take us back in time and do things differently to change your memories or your low opinion of me.”
“Bellowing is not necessary.” She popped her knuckles.
“Apparently, it is,” he said, still speaking quite loudly. “Because you act as if you have never heard me say any of this before.”
“Deny that you are pleased to become an earl,” she dared him.
“Bloody hell, Sophie! You cannot be that deluded. What the blazes do I know about being an earl? From everything I ever observed, I want no part of your Polite Society. I wanted a career in the army, and yet, because I managed to calm the king one fateful afternoon, here I am in the bloody thick of things, right where I never wished to be. My father’s saying is undeniably true.”
“What saying?”
“No good deed goes unpunished.”
She had never seen this side of him before. Vulnerable. Uncertain. Anxious. She caught her bottom lip between her teeth and chewed on it, uncertain what to say to repair the damage she had done.
“I am sorry,” she finally whispered.
He remained silent, his jaw flexing as he resumed staring out the window.
“I am not an expert either when it comes to Polite Society,” she continued. “I snort when I laugh, crack my knuckles when I am nervous or thinking, and would rather be riding than enduring an evening at Almack’s.”
He still did not speak. Nor did he look at her.
She didn’t know what else to say, so she returned to watching the doorway for her mother. “For all the good it will do, I will try to help you all I can. Maman will too. She likes you very much. Always has.”
Ever so slowly, he pulled his gaze from whatever he had been staring at and settled it on her. “You truly felt the only reason I was doing my best to be pleasant today was because of the title?”
“I did.”
A frustrated groan rumbled free of him, and he sagged forward, propped his elbows on his knees, and scrubbed his face with both his hands. “You and I appear to have a great deal to overcome, my lady.”
