Keagan smiled at his faithful friends as they waited wagging their tails. With a shrug, he edged his way out of the room with a grin. “I canna choose between them, Mother. I love them all the same.” Then with a mischievous quirk of a silvery brow, he added before he bounded up the stairs. “Besides, they keep me toasty warm when I snuggle down between them.”
Faolan laughed as he settled his arm around Ciara’s shoulders and pulled her close to his side. “Keagan’s heart is as big and open as the Highlands. Ye wouldna have him any other way.”
With a contented sigh, Ciara snuggled back into Faolan’s arms as her gaze settled on the mesmerizing flames. “He’s an amazing child. When he reads his stories, sometimes he seems so much older. You never know what he’s apt to say. I believe he’s taught me more than I could ever hope to teach him.”
Stroking Ciara’s hair away from her face, Faolan pulled her close. With a tender kiss against her neck, his voice fell to a husky whisper. “He’s almost as amazing as his mother who’s still a wondrous mystery to me this day.”
Ciara turned upon the bench. She shivered with anticipation as she unlaced her dress. There was no one left in the sitting room. There was only Faolan and the fire. She knew in her heart, no matter how much time she spent with Faolan, her desire for him would never wane. The inferno raging whenever they joined had only grown hotter with each passing year. She needed her husband. She needed him inside her. She sensed her time in this world with her loved ones grew short.
Ciara stood. She let her skirts fall to the floor in a woolen heap around her. She held out her hand and waited for Faolan to complete her embrace.
Faolan wasted no time in stripping off his kilt and tunic until nothing remained on his skin but the flickering light of the fire. He pulled Ciara into his arms and folded her into his embrace. He bent his head, covered her mouth with his and lowered them both to the floor.
As the fierce north wind moaned outside the walls, Faolan and Ciara’s moans echoed within. They made love in the firelight of the hearth of the great hall until deep into the night. As the hour grew late, Faolan scooped Ciara up into his arms and carried her up to their room. He held her tight against his chest as though they had just married. As they settled deep into the pillowed softness of the bed, they joined their bodies again.
They didn’t sleep until the sun broke over the horizon; Faolan still buried deep within Ciara. She held him tight as she drifted off into a dreamless void, surely nothing could break this bond.
* * *
They walked in silence,side by side, down to the waves crashing upon the shore. The night breeze wafted warm, filled with the sounds of summer bugs chirruping to the winking stars. The air floated heavy with the scent of pines as the wind danced down from the hills. A late summer’s eve in the Highlands was pure tonic for a weary soul. However, the comfort of the evening was lost to them. Faolan knew Ciara’s heart sank as heavily as his. Once again, she had failed to conceive.
Faolan found a perfect rock on which to sit and held out his hand to Ciara. With a sad smile, she placed her hand in his and climbed up to settle herself between his legs. She leaned back against his chest, her head resting beneath his chin as he wrapped his arms around her. To look out to the horizon, it seemed the world must have ended with the coast of Scotland, so vast and endless was the sea.
They sat in silence and stared out across the ripples of the waves for what seemed like hours. After one of Ciara’s deepest sighs, Faolan rested his cheek atop her head. Lore, he couldn’t believe he’d been such a fool, been such an idiot to add to her pain. “Please forgive me, Ciara. I didna mean to shout. Ye know what a hardheaded fool I can be. I would never mean to cause ye pain. I didna understand what ye were trying to tell me.”
As she pulled his arms tighter around her, Ciara squeezed his hands with hers. “It’s all right, Faolan. I just wish I could give you the answer I know you want to hear.”
Faolan held her so close he could feel her heartbeat against his chest. He flinched at the sorrow he heard in her voice. The pain he knew he’d caused by what he’d thought was a simple request. “Ye’ve already given me one verra fine son. It doesna matter if we never have any more children. Please forgive my thoughtless words, Ciara. I didna realize the risks of your looking into the future. But now that I think over what ye said, I see the truth in your words. I suppose I was desperate when I asked ye to scry the waters of the goddesses' pool to see if we ever have another child.”
With a shuddering sigh, Ciara kept her eyes locked on the tireless crash of the waves. The moonlight sparkled atop the frothing water as silver dust sprinkled from the stars. She shook her head back and forth upon his chest, as she blinked hard against the tears. “There’s nothing to forgive. I hope you truly understand why I’m unable to scry into our own future. It’s too risky, Faolan. I have seen how too much knowledge about what lies ahead can push you over the brink into madness.”
She sniffed as she swallowed hard against her storming emotions and rushed on to try and explain. “I want more children just as much as you. Keagan is almost seven years old. He doesn’t come running to his mother anymore. My baby’s growing up.”
She couldn’t tell him, she’d also hoped in vain over the years if she could become pregnant again, the goddesses would somehow heed her wishes and grant her a reprieve. Surely, they would never remove her from this world if another gifted bairn was on the way. But her womb remained stubbornly empty. It was as though the Powers had sealed it shut. Ciara feared her time with her family was about to run out. She sensed a slow shifting in the energies. Keagan would be seven years old in a few short months, the end of her allotted timeline.
Faolan tightened his hold around her body and swayed as he rocked her in his arms. “All that matters is that I have ye in my life. You and Keagan are all I need.”
She closed her eyes against his words, huge tears escaping to roll down her cheeks. How could she prepare him for the pain that lie ahead? How could she prepare herself?
ChapterTwelve
Boughs of dried flowers and branches of richly colored leaves decorated the mantels and the stone ledges surrounding the hall. Tables groaned beneath platters of roasted hams of wild boar and mouthwatering troughs filled with baked squash and hot buttered breads. The usual entourage of dogs huddled beneath the benches and tables. Their tails thumped as they eyed the tempting morsels headed their way.
Ciara’s heart ached as she stiffly sat in her chair on the dais. Keagan’s seventh birthday. The reason for the late summer feast. How would she ever survive it?
Keagan sat in the place of honor at the main table beside her next to his father. Her throat clenched around the knot of emotions as her son laughed and clapped at the antics of the fiddlers as their music stirred the crowd.
Angus treated them to his best sword dance atop the crossed blades of his own and Maxwell’s swords. He danced with agility, arms raised in the air, touching the tips of his toes between the blades with a frenzy.
The crowd cheered as Angus finished the feat without once touching the blades with his toes. With a sad smile, Ciara bowed her head. If they’d been going to battle, this would’ve been their omen that they’d be successful in their quest. A sign from Cerridwen: Keagan would be successful as he journeyed through life.
Faolan stood with his hands raised and drew their attention, quietening the din of the room. With a proud nod, he waited as they all settled into their seats. Once they had finally grown quiet, he stepped behind his chair and pulled a tartan-wrapped bundle from the shadows. With a wide smile, he uncloaked a small shining sword fashioned after his own massive claymore. As he balanced the hilt in one hand, the blade tip in the other, he turned to his son. “Keagan, ’tis time ye received your own blade to protect ye as ye grow to be a man. ’Tis a proud day that a father stands before his son and puts his first weapon into his boy’s hands.”
Keagan’s eyes widened with excitement. He bowed his head and took the hilt of the sword in his hand. As he held the blade straight up and down in front of his body, he caressed the precious gift with his gaze. With a deep breath, Keagan jumped into his chair, then roared as loud as he could while holding the sword high over his head.“Bi Tren, Bi Treun!”
Everyone in the room joined in the MacKay cry. The pipers coaxed the battle song from their pipes. The walls of the keep trembled as excitement swelled to fill the room. Maxwell and Angus raised Keagan to their shoulders and marched with him around the room. Keagan waved his sword in time with the pipes, his laughter lost among the cheers of the crowd.
Ciara rose unsteadily and stood beside Faolan. Her smile strained until her face ached as she clapped in time to the music. Today was her deadline. Her time was up. She already felt a change in the air. She couldn’t tell if her uneasiness was due to the dread of leaving her family or to the strength of the ethereal summons. Either way, she wouldn’t be able to resist the imbalance for much longer. Her essence couldn’t withstand such a strain of despair. She was about to shatter into the cosmos like a piece of finely blown glass.
