His eyes widened and he started coughing as though struggling for breath. Mairi pushed back her hood and studied him as she thumped him on his back. “Are you okay? Did that last bit of oatcake go down the wrong pipe?”
“Aye.” He coughed and wheezed while pounding on his chest.
Mairi reached back and grabbed the leather skin of whisky hanging behind the seat. Water froze in this weather. Whisky not only stayed in a liquid state but also warmed a belly when nothing else would. “Here. Take a swig. Maybe that will help.”
Ronan obliged her and took several long deep draws from the bag. He handed it back to her without taking his eyes from the road. “I thank ye kindly, lass. It was what I needed to clear my throat.”
She took a short sip before recorking the neck of the skin and hanging it back on its hook. Closing her eyes, she breathed in as the liquid fire trailed down her throat and spread welcomed warmth through her veins. “I will be so glad to get back to the keep. I’m not good at roughing it.”
“Roughing it?” He frowned as though the phrase puzzled him. “Ye dinna relish a wee ride through the woods with yer man?”
“I don’t classify three days and three nights of freezing my ass off as a wee ride.”
He chuckled. “Aye. I dinna wish yer fine arse any harm either. I’m rather fond of it, myself.”
Mairi did her best to ignore a sudden surge of warmth that had nothing to do with the whisky. She wasn’t quite as angry with him as when they started out, but she still wasn’t pleased with his continued penchant to avoid sharing any information that might result in adiscussion.
How could she ever trust him when she was constantly wondering what he might’ve conveniently forgotten to tell her? Her spirits sank a notch. How could she ever have a long-term relationship with a man who refused to let her in? That trait alone told her loud and clear that Ronan couldn’t really love her. If he truly loved her as much as he said he did, wouldn’t he be an open book to her? Wasn’t loving someone a matter of unconditional trust? She stole a sideways glance at him, wishing she knew if he really loved her or not.
He smiled down at her. “We’ll get back to the keep afore nightfall.” He wrapped one arm around her and pressed his mouth to her ear. “I lay odds there’ll be a warm bed awaiting us.” He brushed a kiss against her temple and let his husky whisper warm across her cheek. “I hunger for the feel of yer bareness pressed against me. I would be done with these layers of clothes.”
She lightly patted his hand. “A nice soft bed will be nice.”To sleep in,she silently added. They hadn’t had sex since leaving the keep. They’d come close, but she just couldn’t do it and was happy to let Ronan blame the dangerously cold nights as her reason for not wanting to peel off any layers of clothing. My how things had changed since that chilly night they had warmed each other beneath the ice-coated pines.
Her traitorous body throbbed and ached for his touch, but her bruised heart and heavy conscience just couldn’t give in. Not anymore. Not ever again. She wasn’t sure how she was going to avoid him when there wasn’t the danger of frostbite to blame, but she had to find a way. How could she share her body with a man who didn’t trust her? How could she ever trust him? She pulled in a deep breath and eased it out. No. She would tap dance away from him until they were wed and the curse was effectively broken. No longer needing her, he would probably go his way and she’d return to modern-day Edinburgh and spend her energy looking for a job and burying the hurt in her heart.
“Where are ye, lass?” He leaned in close and nudged her with a lopsided grin. “Are ye planning our wedding, perhaps?”
She forced a smile and breathed in a deep draw of cold air against the heavy ache in her chest. “Whatever you have in mind will be just fine. As long as we’re married.” As long as they married and the curse broke and she could go back and rebuild her life. Mairi’s cheeks felt frozen in place as she held the false smile.
“Gray’s legal advisors can draw up the contract upon our arrival.” Ronan shifted on the bench and worked the reins through his fingers. “Then Gray can perform the ceremony. On the shore. Beside the sea. Do ye not think saying our vows at sunset as the colors reflect off the water would be a fine start to our life together?”
Another faint whiff of sulfur made her sit up straighter. There was still no sign of smoke. What was causing that smell? As she looked around, a slightly unmentioned detail of Ronan’s ceremony plans triggered her liar alarm. “Of course, you mean for us to wait until Graham and your mother arrive. Right? And won’t standing at the water’s edge be colder than dammit this time of year?”
Ronan shifted on the seat and cast a nervous look around. His nostrils flared and his eyes narrowed.
“See? You smell it too. I can tell by the way you’re acting.”
He cleared his throat and coughed. “It is naught but a bit of stench. Perhaps one of the horses has the winds from the herbs in the horse bread.” He waved a hand in front of his face and straightened in the seat, then lightly flipped the reins against the horses’ backs and clucked, urging them to pick up the pace. “We can sign the contract and have our own ceremony beforeMáthairand Graham arrive.” He turned and scooped up her gloved hand and pressed it against his lips. “I want us wed. I need ye to be mine—officially.”
Mairi held her breath against the rapid pounding of her heart. If only he meant those words. She blinked against the sting of unshed tears. The shadows in his eyes belied his words. She had finally realized that he couldn’t quite meet her gaze whenever he was avoiding the truth. What was he not telling her this time?“And what about your mother and Graham?”
He shrugged and smiled as he looked away. “Once they arrive, we will have a grand feast and repeat our vows again in front of them as well as yer kith and kin.” Ronan kissed her hand again. “Do ye not feel such a grand event deserves celebrating more than once?”
A blur of silver and gray racing through the woods on Ronan’s side caught her attention before she answered. “Wait…was that a dog?” His inability to open up and share his real reason for all of a sudden wanting to wed so quickly was immediately forgotten. She turned in the seat, searching the dense terrain more closely. No. Couldn’t be a dog. Not here in the Highland wilderness. It had to be a wolf—probably one that had grown overly brave from hunger. “Over there. Slow down and look. That’s a wolf. I just saw it again.”
“Nay.” Ronan snapped the reins across the horses’ backs, leaning forward as the wagon gained speed. “If wolves be in this wood, we must not tarry. Hold tight.”
She grabbed hold of the edge of the seat as they bounced across the frozen mud of the road, nearly going airborne as the wagon lurched and bumped. “Slow down. I don’t see it anymore.” She wouldn’t tell him if she did. He was about to rattle her teeth out of her head with the rough ride. She swatted Ronan’s arm. “It’s gone. Slow down before you shake our bones loose.”
Ronan eased the horses back to a brisk cantor and pushed the reins into her hands. He pulled his longbow from beneath the seat and nocked the arrow in the bowstring. “Dinna be afraid. If wolves attempt an attack, I will make short work of them.”
She pushed the reins back to him. “If I drive, you won’t have to worry about the wolves. You’ll have to worry about the wagon turning over and breaking your neck. Take back the reins and give the horses a break.” And as long as the wolves left them alone, she didn’t want them hurt. Scotland’s history ran through her head. Thanks to the wolf hunts, the poor wolves would be extinct soon enough.
He put the bow and arrow back down at his feet and took the reins. With a subtle motion of his hands, the horses slowed to an effortless, ground-eating pace. He restlessly hitched back and forth, stealing nervous glances at the ever-thinning stands of trees running along the left side of the road.
Mairi resettled herself on the seat and tucked the heavy furs back across her lap. Ronan’s inability to look her in the eye and his nervous actions ate at her core like a badly digested meal. What was the man lying about this time? Enough. She’d had enough.“Stop the wagon.”
Ronan jerked as though he’d suddenly awakened from a bad dream. “What?” He flipped the reins and leaned forward, coaxing the horses to increase their pace.
