Chapter 16
She had never hoped for a wedding night.
Catriona allowed her gaze to linger on each of the faces of the laughing males sitting around the fire. A warm sense of belonging, warmer than any flame or ember, engulfed her and made her smile. Here she sat. In a cave with no possessions but the clothes on her back. That thought made her smile, too, because she didna give a whit about belongings. Not anymore. Happiness filled her and she could never remember being this content before with her lot in life.
She stole a shy sideways glance at Alexander, then looked away with a quick turn of her head and sip from her cup when he caught her studying him. She both feared and hungered for his dark smoldering gaze that seemed to peer into her soul. He had the ability to unleash surges of heat through her faster than whisky. Even back at the keep, Alexander had always had the power to set her middle to fluttering and make her a little breathless with just a glance. But now…she drew in a shaking breath and swallowed hard.Lord, help me.The power he commanded now.
She swallowed hard. So, this was her wedding night. In a cave. With four mercenaries, two young boys, a priest, and her husband.Husband.How could a mere word release such an avalanche of feelings?
She rolled her tensed shoulders and sat taller, attempting a covert yet casual search of the shadows of the large cave lit only by the fire. Aye, the space was large and the lighting dim, but how in heaven’s name could they expect her to consummate her vows whilst bedding down among the group of men? She gave Alexander another quick glance. Surely, he’d no' expect her to…not with the men all around them.
Such barbarism. Her mother, God rest her soul, would spin so hard in her grave she’d knock the rocks from her burial cairn. Catriona bit back a silent bitter laugh. Her father wouldna give a damn and was more than likely too busy betting with the devil for sole ownership of Hell to pay her struggles in this world any mind. She blinked away the scandalous thought and took another quick sip of the whisky shimmering in the small tin cup that Alexander had retrieved from his pack and handed to her with a shy smile.
Magnus startled her as he stood and motioned for the others to follow. “Come. 'Tis time to leave the bride and groom to themselves. They dinna need an audience.”
“But where will ye go?” Catriona cringed at the nervous squeak in her voice. The night held both excitement and fear when the men left them alone and she wasna…ready. She had never…well, she’d never. Not ever. Not even close. What if she did something wrong and Alexander found her wanting? She had heard of many a marriage where such things had occurred and the man had put the woman out.
“Ye canna sleep out in the cold,” she called after them, struggling to keep the anxious desperation out of her voice.
The men and boys shared knowing looks among themselves. Smiling. Nodding. With much winking and nudging of elbows, they acted as though a prank they'd planned had gone verra well.
Magnus gave Catriona a polite bow. “We’ll be fine, m’lady. We’ll bed down with the horses outside the cave. There’s shelter aplenty there thanks to Sawny and Tom and the night is mild compared to some we’ve endured, I assure ye.”
Catriona folded her hands in her lap and attempted a nonchalant nod. Her hope of avoiding the inevitable lost. Her fate was nigh. “Verra well then. Sleep ye well.”
Each of the men gave Alexander a pointed look as they filed out of the cave and took the two snickering boys along with them. Father William paused halfway, turned back as though to say something, then changed his mind with a quick shake of his head, waving away the thought as he turned and hurried out of the cave.
Catriona kept her gaze locked on the fire, finding it difficult to draw breath. Now, what was she expected to do? What would a wife do? She had no advice to draw from. Motherhad ne’er told her about such things and neither had Gaersa.
“Catriona.”
The way he spoke her name. So soft. Insistent and…possessive. She shivered. 'Twas like an intimate caress that made her long for him to come closer.
“Catriona.” Even softer. A lover’s whisper, or how she’d dreamed a lover’s call might sound.
“Aye?” She stayed focused on the fire, hands knotted in her lap, concentrating on breathing. 'Twas true, back at the keep, whilst he’d been trying to console her about her betrothal, and in the caves after he’d found her, she’d shared his embrace and a few ardent kisses but this…what should she do now?
Alexander slid his hand under hers and nudged her around to face him. He leaned closer, slid a finger under her chin and lifted her face to his. “Do ye fear me, lass?”
His eyes, so telling. Need. Hunger. Yearning. So many emotions shone from those blue-black depths. Catriona hitched in a deep breath and released it with a slow, quiet hiss. “I’m no' afraid of ye…as such.” She gave a nervous swipe of the tip of her tongue across her lips and dropped her gaze, mesmerized by the pulsing tick of his heartbeat at the base of his throat. His unbuttoned tunic revealed such a teasing expanse of chest, the swirls of dark hair across his muscles daring her to stroke her fingertips across his body just as she’d done back at the keep when he’d been unconscious with fever. She forced her focus back to the captivating pull of his eyes, relinquishing herself to the lure of the raging passion she saw storming within them.
“I dinna fear ye. It’s just I dinna wish to disappoint ye.” She highlighted the sentiment with an exasperated twitch of one shoulder.
Alexander smiled as though she hadna said a word then laced his fingers up into her hair. “Your hair has always beguiled me. Fiery as copper. Softer than any silk.” With a gentleness that touched her heart, he freed her tresses from the ribbons and pins. The weight of her unruly mane tumbled down her back and flowed across his hands like liquid fire. He lifted a curl and brought it to his face, stroking it against his cheek and closing his eyes as though savoring the tress like a sample of the finest velvet. He opened his eyes, giving her a look that threatened to melt her where she sat. “Ye could never disappoint me, dearling.” His tone was soft and coaxing. “Not ever.”
“But I dinna ken what to do.”
Alexander responded with nothing more than a kind smile and a gentle cupping of her cheek.
She wanted to be brave and do her best to be a good wife, but she had so little knowledge to go on. Her waning courage bolstered by the look in Alexander’s eyes, Catriona fiddled free her knotted arisaidh and allowed the cloth to fall away from her shoulders.Aye, that’s good. Now…more.She took a deep breath and with a shy hesitance, slid her hands up Alexander’s bared forearms. A delicious aching sensation filled her, making the cave seem verra warm. She wet her lips again and found the courage to reach up and touch the dusting of more than a day’s growth of beard darkening Alexander’s usually clean-shaven jaw. The thick sable bristles had already begun to curl. They tickled against her palm.
“'Tis already soft,” she said more to herself than him.
Without a word, Alexander rose, and eased her to her feet with him. He led her to a thick pile of pallets covered with a plaid and placed her beside it. After a long moment, he slid his hands up her arms and squeezed her shoulders, then bowed his head. “Forgive me for having no finery for ye. Believe me when I tell ye I’m truly sorry our wedding bed is so crude.”
“'Tis fine enough,” she whispered, touching his chest to steady herself after a sudden weakness seemed to overtake her knees and make standing a challenge. Gaining courage and praying he wouldna think her brazen, she smoothed her hands into the opened throat of his shirt and raked her fingers through the hair on his chest. So wiry. So tickling. She couldna get enough of the sensation, all muscled hardness beneath and tickling curls atop.
Alexander tensed and hitched in a breath as though startled by her touch.
