I turned my attention to Grace, but her eyes skittered away from mine. I lowered my gaze back to the man in front of me.
“What kind of doctor are you?” I knew the answer before it was asked.
“I’m a psychiatrist.”
A muscle in my jaw ticked and I narrowed my gaze on Grace. “You called a fucking shrink?”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Grace
Every morning for the last four mornings I woke up with two things: a piercing headache, and the strain of the guilt that just wouldn’t go away, no matter how hard I tried to convince myself that what I did was for his own good.
To say Jacob was furious when he realized I’d called a psychiatrist for him would’ve been a total understatement. The way his eyes conveyed his ire still stung every night when I tried to go to sleep. So instead of sleeping, I found myself rethinking about him over and over. I tossed and turned every night, hence the reason for my headaches.
As I pushed the blanket from my body and sat up to get my day started, I made myself remember the words of Dr. Kearns’. He told me that I was doing thisforJacob and nottohim.
“He’s a danger to himself, and to you, Grace,”he told me over the phone when I first called him, frantic that morning when I heard Jacob beginning to smash and break things in his kitchen.
That morning, I’d never been so thankful to have worked in the medical field in all my life. I knew to call Dr. Kearns instead of the police. I’d read too many news reports of people calling the police when a family member of theirs was in a mental health crisis, only for the police to respond with bullets. Granted, sometimes the situation called for force, if the person was a threat to others, but a mental health professional who could calmly assess and assist in these situations was better.
I worked with Dr. Kearns at my old job, after a few of my former patients became his patients once they were discharged. He was always friendly to the nurses. I kept his card in my wallet, for what I didn’t know, but I was glad to have had it that morning.
Jacob, on the other hand, probably still hated me for calling.
The way he tried to stand and tell both of us that he didn’t need a damn shrink, still clawed at my insides. I stood there feeling so helpless after he stormed off down the hall, slamming his bedroom door shut. Dr. Kearns told me to leave. Of course, initially, I refused. I couldn’t leave Jacob like that. But he’d convinced me, telling me that there likely was no way he could get through to Jacob if I was there.
“He needs to keep his pride right now, Grace,”Dr. Kearns had said.
I wanted to tell them both to hell with his pride. He needed help. However, it wouldn’t have done any good. So finally, I relinquished my position, grabbed my belongings, and headed out. I had to catch an Uber to the place where the Underground was held since my car had been left there overnight.
That was four days ago, and if I hadn’t received a call from Dr. Kearns informing me that Jacob had agreed to his thirty day in-patient treatment center, I would have no idea what was going on with him. The man I loved.
My shoulders slumped as I proceeded across the hall to my bathroom to get showered and ready for the day. It’d been four days since I returned to work. I had two days off and called in sick the previous two days, hoping that time would give me the space and clarity I needed to be able to function properly. However, as I washed the soap off my body, my headache still pounding, I realized that’d only been a pipe dream. Ready or not, I needed to get back to work. The last thing I needed was to sit around my house for another day hoping for a call from Jacob or wondering what was going on with him.
So, an hour later, I found myself strolling off the elevator, an extra large cup of my usual vanilla-flavored coffee in my hand, which helped with my headache, and into the nurses’ station. Per usual, there were a number of nurses hanging out at the desk, either completing some last minute task at the computer, telling the new nurses who were just coming on for our shift what patients to keep an eye out for, or gathering their belongings before heading out for the day. But my stomach dropped when, as soon as I approached the desk, it seemed as if all conversation stopped.
Sighing, I lifted my gaze, looking at my co-workers. Lisa, who sat at one of the computers darted her gaze away from me as if I were some sort of leper. There were two other women in the corner who were obvious about openly staring at me. I wasn’t surprised to find one of those women to be Suzanne. A warning bell went off in my gut at the sight of her face. I never trusted her, though she never gave me a reason not to. She’d been good to all of her patients, for the most part, she did her job, and as far as I knew, she knew her stuff. But it was the way she always seemed to glam onto Jacob when he was around that I didn’t like. Of course, most would just excuse that as petty jealousy on my part. And sure, that was likely part of the reason, but there was something else that didn’t curl all the way over about her.
Now that she’d accused Jacob of attacking her, I really didn’t trust her. Deep in my gut I knew there was more to the story than she was giving.
“Good morning, Grace. Glad to see you’re back.”
I smiled over at Charles, another surgical nurse on our floor. “Good morning, Charles. Thank you. How’re you doing?”
He rolled his eyes skyward. “Ask me in about …” he paused to look at the watch on his wrist, “another four hours.”
We both laughed.
Thankfully, Charles’ little intervention seemed to break up the tension and the rest of the nursing staff went on about their business as usual.
“Grace, once you’ve gotten settled in, Marta from legal wants to speak with you in her office,” Lisa stated before sliding a business card across the desk in my direction.
I leaned in and picked the card up, looking it over. Marta Ringwald, Esq. with the number of her office, which I recognized as being in the executive suites of the hospital. Again, it felt like the conversations around me halted and all eyes were cast in my direction.
I shoved the business card in the pocket of my scrubs.
“I’ll get to Marta when I have time,” I responded defiantly and lifted my chin. “Right now, I have patients to check on.” I proceeded to the computer that was free, to Lisa’s right, and logged in to look up the information on my patients for the day, before exiting the nurses’ station to go check on the people in the hospital who really mattered.
