“Besides, he’s been out of town the last few days on business.” Add to that, we weren’t even sleeping in the same bedroom, but I didn’t tell Michelle that part. Some things are best kept between a husband and wife, even if it was a forced, fake marriage.
“I’m sure he’s just trying to be helpful.”
I didn’t say anything. Aaron was being his controlling self. I decided to change the topic and we discussed the upcoming school year that started in the next two weeks. Michelle and I walked around the neighborhood for a few blocks until we came upon the Williamsport City Park.
“Carter doesn’t work too far from here, right?” I questioned.
Michelle nodded. “He just got off, though,” she stated, peering at the time on her cell phone.
“How’d you two meet?” I asked.
A wistful smile crossed Michelle’s face and she began telling me of how she met Carter after getting in a pretty scary car accident. He was a Williamsport Firefighter and his station received the call for the rescue.
“After that, I was pretty much his,” she giggled.
“They seem to have that type of appeal.”
“They?”
“All the Townsends.”
“Yours in particular?”
I sighed. “Aaron and I are…”
“Complicated?”
“Very.” I nodded.
Thankfully, Michelle didn’t ask too many more questions about Aaron and I. We parted early that afternoon after Carter called Michelle once he arrived home after his shift. I grinned at the smile on her face as she hung up and made up some excuse about needing to go. Luckily, I wasn’t too disappointed when Michelle pulled off. I realized that only two blocks from Excelor Academy was the newest branch of the Williamsport City Library. Never one to turn down a trip to the library, I ventured inside and to my delight one of the first things I saw was a flyer advertising a position for a librarian at that branch. A job there would be perfect since it was so close to the kids’ school, and of course, I’d get to do what I loved.
I headed straight to the front desk and struck up a friendly conversation with the head librarian. She informed me of the qualifications for the job and after briefly going over my experience she granted me a warm smile. I still had to submit the application online and go through an interview but this opportunity was looking up.
“Tell me your name again?”
“Patience To-Theirs. Patience Thiers,” I informed, giving my maiden name.
“Great. Submit your application as soon as you can and we should be able to schedule an interview by the end of the week.”
“Great.” Smiling, I went to do a walk through of the rest of the library. By the time I left a couple of hours later, I was feeling a little more like myself.
I passed through the doors of the library, preparing to walk the few blocks to the school to pick up the children, but stopped short when a prickle of fear ran down my spine. I turned my head to the right and then the left, looking up and down the street. Other than the normal passersby that frequented the city streets during the summer there was nothing out of the ordinary. Still, that familiar feeling of being watched fell over me. I pivoted in the direction of the children’s school, walking swiftly, and for the first time feeling relief upon seeing our normal driver waiting at the sidewalk. Even as I loaded the children into the car, I peered over my shoulder, looking for what or whom I didn’t know, but the feeling of unease lasted with me all the way until we arrived home.
****
“I’ll be in my office downstairs if you or the children need me,” Aaron informed me. He said the same thing every night right before leaving our bedroom and going down to sleep in the office.
For the first time, I wanted to beg him not to go. To stay with me for the night because that uneasy feeling from earlier was not yet a distant memory. But instead of telling him this, I simply nodded and flipped to the next page of the book I was reading on my Kindle. I felt his gaze linger on me, but he didn’t say a word. The next thing I heard was the door closing as he left. I sighed and continued reading for the next hour until my eyes couldn’t stay open any longer. Placing my Kindle on the nightstand, I turned off the light. A few minutes later I drifted off into a restless sleep.
“You whored yourself out for him! While I was right here!”
“No! No! No!” I yelled, waking myself out of my sleep. I arose, panting and looking around the darkened room. I scrambled to get out of bed, stumbling as my foot got caught up in the sheet. I didn’t even think as I moved to the bedroom door, pulling it open and going first to Kennedy’s room. She was sound asleep in her bed. Next, I moved to Kyle’s room and found him in the same state as his sister. Safe and sound asleep.
I made it back to the master bedroom and pressed my back against the door, doing my best to take deep inhales. Placing my hand over my pounding chest, I pushed away the memories that so often found their way into my dreams.
“It was just a dream,” I whispered to myself. “They’re okay. You’re okay,” I repeated over and over until my heart rate slowed to its normal rhythm. It was my usual routine after one of my nightmares. I hadn’t had one in months, but I knew that uneasy feeling from earlier was what brought it on. That was how it usually went. Every now and then, I’d find myself looking around a crowd, feeling as if I’m being watched, yet finding nothing out of the ordinary. Later that same night a nightmare would make its appearance of that night five years ago.
I shook my head, forcing myself not to think about it. Climbing in bed, I willed myself to go back to sleep.
