In the six months since we’d seen each other, I hadn’t been able to get him out of my head. I was half-convinced I’d blown this out of proportion, and that the moment we had in my cabin should’ve just remained that. A moment.
Standing in front of him, though, with his hands roaming freely over my body, impatiently taking me out of my clothes as I impatiently removed his, that electric sense ofknowingwas back in full force. I knew his body, as he knew mine. And here, halfway around the world, even under entirely different circumstances, there was no denying the energy between us. Hisbreath caught as my thumbs went to my underwear, and he whistled as I slid them down and off my legs.
“Jesus, I’ve needed this so much,” he said, slowly sinking to his knees, his hands on my thighs. His shoulders sagged, as if they could finally stop holding up the weight of the world. He nestled into my pubic hair and inhaled deeply, then looked up, his eyes meeting mine. They shone with a combination of relief and horniness.
And that was the sensation. All those long months, I’d been sitting on tenterhooks, clearing cases, thinking about my next steps. Knowing I was approaching a fork in the road. I was gonna have to give up on him or go all in. Any reasonable person would’ve given up a month in, two months in, three months in. But I hadn’t found it in myself to be reasonable, and I couldn’t figure out why.
Standing here, towering over him as he nosed the soft and hardening parts of me, I finally understood why I couldn’t simply assign Jesse Travis to the bin of lessons learned. From the day he showed up at my cabin, my protective instincts around him had been on overdrive. Being away from him so long had killed me, not just because I missed him physically, but because I couldn’t keep him safe from my little cabin on the lake.
I didn’t need to be told he was more than just his record, more than just a guy who dragged himself out of a sinking vehicle, more than just someone who would do what it took to survive. Something in me had always seen more.
All this lifetime criminal had ever wanted was achance to feel safe. Unguarded in a way he never could have been in his old life. And the thought that I could possibly be the one to stand watch, to give him that space between himself and the world, to give him a chance to just fucking breathe…made my heart beat as it never had before.
I wanted nothing more than to be the man strong enough to allow him to be soft.
I had no idea what the hell this would look like, but you couldn’t have dragged me away from that moment. You couldn’t have threatened me with enough jail time to stay away from him.
Jesse took my cock in his mouth, sucking on it, gently at first, as if introducing himself. I grinned at the thought, then moaned as he sucked a little harder.
“Yeah, baby. Just like that.”
My hand went to his shaved head, and as much as I’d loved the halo of curls, this felt good under my palms too.Hefelt good.
I figured things would turn into a fuck-fest the second we were in each other’s orbits again, and while that was definitely happening, it wasn’t the most important thing. The thing I felt more than anything was the opposite of the desperation I’d been carrying around in my chest. This was coming home. This was intimate.
And if I was wrong, I was so fucked.
But then Jesse shot me another of those soft looks, and I knew I hadn’t been wrong at all.
As much as I was enjoying the blowjob, I needed something a little more.
“Come here,” I said, gripping his shoulder. He pulled away—oh so delicious and slow—blinking up at me. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
I took his hand, helping him stand, and I put my arms around him. Hugging him tight to me.
“Fuck,” he breathed into my chest. “I didn’t know how much I missed you until this very second.”
“Same.”
I spared a glance for his rumpled covers, and he took my hand in his, dragging me down to the bed with him. We faced each other, kissing, as we tangled our limbs. He first rolled on top of me, kissing me deeply. Then we switched places, and I pinned him down, showing him how much I missed him.
“I need you inside of me so bad,” he said, breathless from our last kiss.
“Turn on your side,” I commanded softly.
He sent me a gorgeous smile and immediately complied. Reaching across the bed to the tiny nightstand, he riffled through the drawer before handing a small bottle of lube over his shoulder. I took the bottle and kissed his shoulder as I poured the slick liquid onto my fingertips.
He leaned against me, and I shifted, snaking one arm under him and across his chest as I parted his cheeks with the other.
“Mm, yes,” he breathed out, his body pliant, willing.
I swirled my fingers just so as I tightened my arm across his chest.
“I haven’t been with anyone,” he whispered.
“Me either.”
