“Accidents aren’t anyone’s idea of a good time,” the whole shop chorused.
The students knew the saying because I had said it a hundred times last year. But, like me, the Lost Boys had learned it from Mr. Paige. We all chuckled, but I checked in with my friends, and their eyes were as shiny as mine.
I shook my head at my carelessness. “Mr. Paige would so kick my ass right now.”
“You never curse in class, Mr. Walker,” Leo said, popping his brows.
“It’s a good thing this isn’t an official class, then.”
The kids laughed, and everyone went back to work while I checked out my knuckles. I’d nicked one and grazed the others, nothing serious. I taped them to prevent sawdust from getting in there, and then Ozzie and I got back to work.
“Sure you’re okay?” he asked, changing out the disc on his sander.
“Yeah, I’m fine. A little embarrassed that I’m the only one who got hurt today, though better me than anyone else.”
“But that’s kind of what today is about, right? Testing out the theory, seeing if it’ll work, seeing if there’s anything we need to be careful of.”
“Me around a sander, apparently,” I retorted, following his lead by switching out my sanding disc.
He set his sander down for a moment to observe the activity going on around the classroom. Then he leaned his shoulder into mine and spoke directly into my ear. “It’s been a good day, though, right?”
I nearly dropped the sander again.
“They’ve never been this excited,” I admitted. “I can’t believe the students from last year showed up. How did they even know we were doing this?”
Ozzie raised a brow and lifted his chin toward the chief troublemaker.
“Of course.” I laughed, shaking my head. “Makes sense. This was his idea, after all.”
“He might’ve been the one to tell them, but they made the decision to come. I think you’re being a little too hard on yourself. I bet the classes last year were fine. They just weren’t quite meeting the students where they were at—and because you’re a good teacher, you listened when one of them had a better idea. I’ve heard you say you’re no Mr. Paige, but that’s exactly what he’d do.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but he barreled past my objection. “You’re the next generation, Walk. These kids won’t show up for a teacher who doesn’t give a shit. They’re here on a Saturday morning because they want to hang with you. They like you. And Mr. Paige?—”
Ozzie paused, the words seeming to catch in his throat. “Mr. Paige must’ve seen that in you. Before the new clothes, before the haircut. He knew what he was doing when he gave you that carpenter’s square,” he said, gesturing to the tool that was now sitting on a stand on my desk.
“Dammit, Ozzie.” I ducked my chin, wiping away a renegade tear.
Guilt flashed in Ozzie’s eyes. “Sorry, man. Didn’t mean to?—”
I waved him off. “No, it’s all good. I needed to hear that. I’ve been feeling like a fucking failure in every area of my life, and…”
Turning so that his body blocked me from the classroom, Ozzie laid a gentle hand on my arm. “You’re not a failure, Walk. You’re overworked, you’re trying to make too many people happy, and you’re new at this. You get to be new. You get to make mistakes. Literally no one thinks that you’re a failure. Hell, you’re a Lost Boy. We don’t make failures.”
I kept my chin tucked into my chest in case any other tears were hanging about. Being reminded of Mr. Paige’s faith in me brought up emotions every time, but Ozzie’s words tugged at a painful string, one that could unravel me wholesale if I wasn’t careful. He didn’t call me anhonoraryLost Boy like the others usually did. He said that Iwasa Lost Boy, and that was more meaningful than he could ever fathom.
Especially now.
“Okay,” I said, clearing my throat, refocusing on the sander situation. “I’m going to need you to stop saying nice things about me, because I will definitely shave off the rest of my knuckles if I sand while crying.”
His laugh, deep and ebullient, spread through my muscles and the bendy parts of my brain, down the back of my neck.
Seriously—how had I ever convinced myself that I was straight?
CHAPTER18
ozzie
The bunk bed experiment was a success, showing us what the teens could do when they cared about the project they were working on.
