“Er…” I scrunch my face, wishing I knew how to be comfortable with this level of nudity and honesty. “Fine. Maybe. But it’s notjustthat.”
Ant pauses and draws back. “Wait. Erik, have you ever been fucked?”
My face flushes as I hesitate.
His expression softens even as he goes in for the kill. “If I had to be honest about you being my first real kiss and first real fuck, then you have to be honest about this.”
Fair. Totally fair…wait.
“I was your first real kiss?” I ask, my heart like a hummingbird as I cup his sweet face.
He smiles and touches his lips to mine. “Yes. It was the most perfect kiss I could have ever wished for. Better than my imagination.”
Okay, nudity and honesty might not besobad. I distract him with more of my perfect kisses. After a few moments, he puts his hands on my chest and pushes back.
“Answer the question, Erik.”
So close.
I take a deep breath and go with the truth. “Not by another person, no. I mean, I’ve played around a little with dildos, but that’s it.”
He traces my lips with the soft tip of his finger. “So…you’re letting me take your ass virginity?”
“It’s not that big a deal,” I mutter. “Though…is this the first time you’ve topped someone?”
Ant shakes his head, tracing his fingers over my jawline. “No. Still, your trust means a lot to me. Just so you know.”
Mollified, I kiss him softly and touch my forehead to his. “I wasn’t lying. Ever since I met you, you’ve been facing your fears. It makes me want to do the same. I definitely wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.”
He rubs his chest, then mutters,“You’re fucking killing me,”before going in for another round of kisses.
By the time we part, we’re both breathless, hard, and ready. I pull one of the fluffy pillows under my hips, and he kisses his way down my chest.
“You still okay with me going without a condom?” he asks, stopping to nuzzle my balls.
“Yes,” I grit out as he slides down my cock with his hot, otherworldly mouth.
Sucking lightly, he multitasks by spreading lube on his fingers while shouldering between my thighs—which practically dwarf him—and gently swirls the lubrication around my hole. Once the muscle has softened a bit, he carefully pushes in his middle finger. My cock jumps at the additional input, and Ant hums in satisfaction.
He’s slow and gentle with the build, but he definitely knows what he’s doing with his fingers down there. Adding a second one, he carefully scissors, opening me a bit more.
“I don’t mind a little pain. You can go ahead.”
His eyes reach mine as if to verify my words. Satisfied, he indulges in a few more sucks, then slowly drags his mouth off my dick. Crawling up my body, he shares the taste of my cock in another quick kiss, then scoots down and adds a bit more lube before he notches the head of his dick at my entrance.
I send him another reassuring nod, and he pushes inside me.
“Fuck.”
I was not expecting it to sting quite so much.
“Sorry, sorry,” he says, pulling away.
I reach down for his arms, stilling him. “You’re okay. I said I liked the pain. You’re just a little bigger than I gave you credit for.”
“I’m notthatsmall,” he grumps. “I just suffer in comparison toyou.”
I give a rough hum, then grip his ass, pulling him farther inside me as I grind my jaw through the stretch. He follows my lead, rolling his trim hips until tightness slowly but surely deconstructs into pleasure.
