“Some. I…” I hesitate then plow forward because we’re already here. “I have sensation, but I can’t get hard enough for penetration. If I get anything more than half-hard, it’s painful.”
“Sensation? Really?” She sounds pleased, which strikes me as funny since that would make her the only woman I’ve ever pleased with my gold-star dick. “Well, that’s something to work with. And I noticed that you only have one testicle. Is that from the blast as well?”
“Yes. They had to remove the damaged one. And that gave me a little more slack with the skin.” Burn scars on a penis make for terrible logistics, though that feels a little self-evident now that I say it.
“Would you be interested in an implant to create the resemblance of two testicles?”
I make a face and she holds up her hand, biting back a smile. “That’s a no. Got it.”
She looks back down at her notes, checking off a few things, talking to herself. “So is the lack of penile turgidity only due to the pain caused by the scarring, or is there another dysfunction? Physical or mental?”
“I don’t know. I don’t like to talk about it all that much. I spent most of my focus just learning how to walk again and surviving burn care.” People have no idea the special torture that is burn care. My heart starts to beat faster as sweat beads up on my upper lip.
She looks up from her notes, her eyes assessing. “I apologize for causing you distress. I do however believe that I can give you a lot more functionality back.”
“You really think you can do that?”
“I do. Actually, the skin grafting procedure is something I’ve done many times, and this is far from my first time performing a penile skin graft. They’re a fun challenge because I’ll be working with full to varying levels of partial-thickness to ensure that you retain both functionality and sensation.”
Penile skin graft. Least. Favorite. Phrase. Ever. “Glad I could provide you with a meaningful challenge.”
I’m not sure she got the sarcasm because her enthusiasm remains alarmingly high. “And hey, I see that you were circumcised—you can choose to go uncircumcised if you’d like.”
Wait, what?
Did she just say that she could give me a turtleneck? Huh. Always wondered what that would be like. “So how does this work? Is it the serum that Anders always has with him?”
“The serum is definitely a critical component to the success of this surgery. However, as I believe you are aware, there are limitations. It won’t grow back your skin, but it makes the process of transplanting the decellularized skin matrix significantly easier and the result will have minimal to no scarring.”
That perks my radar. I know Anders mentioned something about it, but having Dr. Tamashiro confirm it makes me begin to picture what it would be like to have smoother skin. Though… “Decellularized skin matrixsounds like sci-fi.”
She laughs as though I said something funny. “Oh, a version of that’s been around in the real world for a while now. It’s the gold standard for burn patients with the amount of skin involvement you have. You might be happy to know that the technique I’ll be using on your penis isn’t new and, statistically speaking, has excellent results. Now, our matrix is a bit more advanced, and the serum makes all the difference in the world, but what we’re doing is not unheard of.”
“So you’re saying I can get my knee back and a bonus dick out of all of this?”
Dr. Tamashiro’s cheeks go pink and she shakes her head, laughing to herself. I wasn’t saying it to be funny.
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard it called a bonus dick before, but yes. The therapy on that takes longer than your knee, but it’s worth it, I think. I can’t one hundred percent promise that you’ll be able to have penetrative sex, but there’s a pretty good chance you will. At minimum, it’ll hurt less when you become aroused.”
“You say that the recovery takes longer. What does that involve?”
“Mostly masturbation, either solo or with a partner. Gentle at first, but then we ask you to increase the…”
“Roughness?” I ask, remembering the therapist who was assigned to help me figure out how to ejaculate while wearing a cock cage. He was a very nice older gentleman, but…if I could erase a day in my life, that one is top five, barely edging out my grandmother’s death and getting blown up.
She tilts her head back and forth. “Yeah, that’s about right. It would be a couple of weeks before we let you attempt anything with penetration though.”
She saysweeksas though that’s a long timeline. Or as though it hasn’t beenyearssince I’ve had any action other than my right hand. Speaking of which…
“I’m gay, so any penetration I attempt…”
“Will likely require more lube than you’re used to, at least initially,” she says, winking at me. “You’ll want to take things slow, but you’ll be surprised at how quickly full function returns.”
I picture Odd, on his knees, smiling over his shoulder at me as he arches his back. And I quickly remember that my dick is the least of my problems. I could get everything in perfect working order, physically, but that doesn’t help my head. So yeah, still not doing that to him. And I’m still his boss. Technically.
“How does that sound to you, Mr. Blaylock?”
Too good to be true.I’ve learned to stop hoping for some kind of magical fix, especially when the fixes always need to be fixed and I’m left with more pain than functionality. My doctors are always shocked that I don’t have an addiction to painkillers. Fuck, so am I.
