“That, my friend, is exactly what tonight is about. And I plan on letting Jules put you on the ground at least a few times for good measure.”
He throws his hands up in surrender. “I suppose that’s only fair.”
The night goes incredibly well, even better than I expected. We’ve got a lot going on at the gym, but I think we’ll be able to make this a monthly class, free to everyone who goes here. By the end of the night, Jules and Leon are cracking each other up, making five-dollar bets and exchanging numbers. Both of them like golf, and Jules invites him to join her lesbian friends for a round this Saturday.
It is sometimes hard to know where to draw the line with people. I spy Nick in the corner watching after us, and I’m grateful that he’s the kind of guy who gives a second chance when warranted. I think it’s kind of like what he said about letting amputees find their own balance, though the mental side of things is… delicate. Some of these guys are gonna screw things up, badly. And we’ve got to figure out the balance between taking care of the people who society has done a bad job of caring for and making sure that the people in our care are safe. Hopefully, we’ll get that right more often than not.
Chapter Twenty-One
Nick
Roly and I are processing the monthly bills, including payroll, and we are both stupidly excited to give Elijah his first full paycheck. We both agreed that we should back pay the entire paycheck at the assistant manager salary, and it’s amazing to think that he’s only been with us for six weeks. It seems like forever ago because we’ve gotten so much done in such a short time frame with him here.
I click the final approval button on the HR website. “It’s been cool to watch what this job is doing for Elijah. I mean, when he first came here, when he wasn’t wearing Wrecked gear, he was always so unkempt.”
“True that.”
“I mean, it looked like he’d slept in the dirt and then come to the gym via wind tunnel.” I laugh, thinking about some of his less-than-fashionable choices.
A frown crosses Roly’s face, and the stacking motion he’s doing with the flyers is thrown into slo-mo, as if his brain’s processor needs a minute.
“Whatcha thinking ’bout over there, Roly?”
He continues to stare at me, his mouth set at an odd angle, and I know from his reaction to us at the dinner that he’s figured out about me and Elijah, but we still haven’t talked about it. “Look, man…”
He waves me off. “I don’t care about that. He’s good for you.”
I’d told him on more than one occasion that employees were strictly forbidden, and he could’ve been a real dick about it. But, yeah… I think he really is okay with it.
Still, I don’t like the expression on his face.
“You know, when I think about how haggard he was, it makes me wonder if he hadn’t been…”
“Hadn’t been what?” I take my hand off the mouse and turn to fully face him.
“Living rough.”
There’s a buzzing in my ears that I sometimes get when I’m being told really bad news. Like when Scout told me she had breast cancer and that she’d need a double mastectomy to save her life, I practically couldn’t hear for two days. “What do you mean, living rough? Like… homeless?”
He looks up at me, his eyes sad. “Maybe.”
Roly’s question bothers me, and we both turn back to the computer and pull up Elijah’s W-4 on the HR website. I scan the page for his address, and it’s a single-dwelling property in the University Hills neighborhood. Nowhere near close enough for a walk. “Sorry,primo. He’s either lying about walking to work, or he’s lying about his address.”
I shake my head, trying to make sense of it. “Do you really think he would sleep on the streets when he knows that he could sleep in a warm bed?”
He thinks on it for a moment. “If he’s homeless, he needs this job more than he needs you, even if he likes you. He can’t risk you freaking out over commitment—which, by the way, is something you would totally do—then fire him.”
“Yeah, but I’m not freaking out over a commitment. I think I might actually want it.” I mean sure, saying that makes me want to throw up a little, but it’s also the truth.
“Well, have you considered that maybe he can’t do commitment? Like, you might be ready—and that makes me so fucking happy, you have no idea—but maybe yours is not the only bed he has available to him? He’s a beautiful man, Nick.”
Oh, fuck.
Fuck.
Yeah, I can’t let my mind go there. At all.
Roly frowns again.
