“Are you ready?” Denis asked ten minutes later, once Dax had returned. I tried not to lose my cool at his millionth offer of an out.
I’d wanted to do this since I was five.
His eyes softened, and I dipped my head—but then anxiety clenched my chest.
“Actually, can you wait?” I asked.
Dax and June shuffled awkwardly on either side of me.
“I just have a quick thing I need to do,” I reassured them, hoping to soothe the sudden ripple of concern.
Denis squared his shoulders and positioned himself in front of me, blocking the view of the recruits.
“Go ahead,” he said simply.
I skirted around the temporary tables and chairs, ignoring a panicked glance from the woman in the brown pantsuit. Slipping through the gate, I silently thanked my biological mum for the great rack that held a collection of things, including my phone. I have to admit that I felt mild anxiety putting it there now after the article about the electromagnetic waves. Nothing like a good headline to keep you paranoid. Or careful?
I scrolled through my contacts and pushed the call button.
“Riley?” the strained voice answered after one ring. I felt the newly familiar rage sweep through my body with the heat of a blue flame, but I kept my voice contained. Through the burning, my chest squeezed, and could sense the little caged bird that had something to say.
“I want you to be my dad.”
A few moments of silence passed before I heard a choked snort, and my dad cleared his throat.
“Thank-you,” he whispered. I’d made Colin cry more times in the last fortnight than I’d seen in my lifetime. Well, in thirty years of my lifetime, and I couldn't help the guilt that filled my throat as a result.
“I’m angry,” I said. “And I don’t know if that will ever change. But I needed you to know that.”
“I understand, Ry,” he said, using the nickname he never had before. My heart clenched.
“For what it’s worth, I’m so sorry. And I want you to know that I want to be your dad. So much. And I will continue to be in your life in any way that you allow me to be. I want you to know I’m here, but I don’t want to pressure you.”
I nodded, not that he could see it, and I let silent tears dry on my face.
“I love you,” he said, filling the stillness.
“I love you too,” I replied without hesitation and disconnected the call.
The crease between June’s eyes deepened as I returned. The firefighters had moved into their groups, now scattered around the property. I probably should’ve insisted they shoot the annual firefighter calendar here tonight. Felt like a missed opportunity.
“You all good?” June asked, just as Denis’s folded arms mirrored the question.
“Ready to go,” I said with a smile, feeling lighter.
I couldn’t read Dax’s expression.
“Off we go then.” Denis cocked his head in the direction of the house. For the first time tingles filled my body, dripping out my fingertips. I finally felt excited. I was eager for this moment, but I felt excited about my future too, and that was a novelty all on its own.
Denis led the way, and June and I fell into step behind him before I felt a hand tug the back of my arm. I spun around to find Dax’s dark eyes looking down at me, his long lashes making him look impossibly handsome.
“Do you need me in there?” he asked, shifting his gaze towards the front door that Denis and June were now walking through.
The question of need always filled my stomach like curdled milk on a hot day.
Dax’s mouth curved as he placed his palms gently on either side of my arms.
“Do you want me in there?”
