Hand in hand, they climbed the ladder, one below the other. It was hard to ignore the hum of joy and excitement pulsating through the room from the kids and dogs. Sadie barked happily from one corner, with the other dogs chiming in from various spots on the couches, chairs, and floor.
“All right, hand it over, Angela. Okay, one, two, three, Brandon, turn on the lights!”
The room erupted into a thunderous roar of cheering and laughter, and the lights twinkled and danced in response. The angel sitting above it all looked down with blessings, much like Angela believed her mother had done all these years.
“Wow!” Angela stepped off the ladder to admire it all.
Emma followed suit, dusting her hands off as she moved. “Tell me about it! I think if Dad were still here, he’d love this. He’d never say it, of course, but he’d admire it, secretly.”
Angela sat with her sister for a long time, admiring the tree long after the kids went to bed, and Brandon retired after settling the dogs. Together, they sipped cocoa as the wind outside blew across the all-glass-windowed great living room.
“I think I’ll finish his bedroom tomorrow morning if that’s okay.”
“Sure, Angela, you two may have been estranged, but he always asked about you. He loved you just as much as he loved me, but he just couldn’t let it go. You know.”
“I do.”
“I think if you’d made a bigger effort to let it go, too, brought Steven back here often, and forced him to acknowledge his grandson, he would have. It would have been hard, but he would have done it. He suffered just as much as you both did. Wrong,yes, he was for what he did, and I told you this a thousand times, but it needed to be both of you making the effort.”
Angela’s emotions were suddenly raw, and she nodded, unable to deny or agree.
“That's water under the bridge now. Your son is grown, you’ve got a great life, we both do, and Dad is with Mom.”
“I know this.”
“But you're worried about Steven. Honestly, when I talk to him, he doesn’t seem like the same young man with issues like you dealt with. Sure, he’s quiet and thoughtful, maybe a bit too much, but that could be who he is and who he will be. As long as he’s not in trouble with the law or doing bad things, let him be who he is. He will find his way. I’m betting some of that comes from how he grew up as he did and some from Evander.”
Curious, Angela looked at her sister, still feeling a bit of love for the father of her son. “How so?”
“Not in a bad way, just who he was. When you and Evander were together, it was lightning bolts and fireballs of love, passion, and excitement. You two lit each other up, but alone, when I saw Evander back then, he was different—kind of like Mom and Dad, I guess. He was quieter and more thoughtful—deep, I guess you could say. Whereas my Brandon, he’s a workaholic, just dying to get back to the ranch and normalcy. If you remember, Evander didn’t know himself at first, but he had ideas he only shared with you until he was certain of himself.”
“You’re right, Emma. What would I do without you?”
“I don’t know, but I feel the same.” The shared hug was a perfect ending to the day as they both stood up to walk down the hall. “Good night, sis.”
“Night, Emma.”
It was a horrible night's sleep, as thoughts and feelings she couldn’t control invaded Angela’s mind. She woke several times.She was glad when the sun came up and she could continue cleaning quietly.
Cup of coffee in hand, she shuffled through the nightstand, finding odd assortments of papers, medicine bottles, and tools. One by one, she gathered them up and placed them where they belonged.
When she found an envelope, pristine white and buried at the bottom of the drawer with Emma and her name on it, she set it aside. Only after she’d finished cleaning up in his room did she decide to take a break with another cup of coffee.
“Morning, Emma. I’m going out to sit by the water for a bit and clear my head. It's a bit warmer out there today.”
“Yeah, whatever you call warm in December in Maine. I can’t wait to go back to Oklahoma, where there's none of this. Want some company?”
“Nah, I’m good. I’ll be back in a few minutes. I just need a break, and then we can continue. Kids still asleep?” The dogs gathered at the door, eager to rush out when she opened it.
“No, Brandon took some of them into town for supplies, and the others are still asleep. Steven is upstairs looking around the attic. He was hoping Grandpa might have some music he could listen to as well. I tried to tell him it's not going to be to his liking, but he wouldn’t listen to me.”
Shrugging her shoulders, deciding that letting him find his own way was the only option, Angela left the house and headed toward the water. The craggy rocks meeting the foamy waves of the ocean always soothed her as she grew up.
“Thank goodness for this. The best part about this town.” She sat on a rock, the envelope still tucked in her jeans pocket, the silence around her a relief.
She watched the waves crash against the shoreline for a long time, recalling all the moments she and Evander had spentdoing the same. Memories of her childhood flowed through her easily and peacefully, bringing a smile to her face.
Even thoughts of her father and life without her mother didn’t cause any pain. Her heart opened with joy, as life simply chased away any memories of her life back in Chicago. Even her work couldn’t crowd it out.
