"And here you are." Kofi tipped my chin toward his face and spoke against my lips. "Allowing him to rule your mind and your life."
I could have uttered a thousand protests, but it wouldn't have done any good. Kofi had cut to the heart of my sickness and laid it bare for both of us to examine. Trying to deny the truth of his words would have been useless, so I stayed quiet absorbing what they meant and what I'd be giving up—resentment of my mother for what happened to me, plus self-hate for allowing someone to take away my right to say no. And there was also disgust over being unable to stand up to my mother and get her to butt out of my life.
"I shouldn't have to tell you this," Kofi said, wiping away tears I didn't know had escaped. "It wasn't your fault. You said no. He didn't listen. If you could have prevented it from happening we wouldn't be having this conversation, right?"
"Yes."
"Again, I'm not trying to force you to do anything, but give your mother the chance to talk to you. Despite what you may think, you really have no idea what she wants to say to you and it will give you the opportunity to share the things you need to, without all the anger you have going on."
I snuggled my head into his chest and made a sound I hoped he'd take as acquiescence. In a perfect world his approach would be ideal, but I doubted I had the strength to go digging through history that was best left buried.
My eyelids drooped while Kofi's heartbeat provided a sweet lullaby as I drifted toward sleep.
***
IWOKE CONSCIOUS OFthe chill in the room, which raised goosebumps on my skin. The weight of Kofi's arm or leg would normally have anchored me to the bed, but he wasn't next to me. His energy was missing.
Despite that, I smiled because I was complete knowing he was somewhere close by. I hadn't experienced this sense of inner satisfaction in a while, if ever. This quiet, yet powerful man had turned things upside down in my life and was still busy shifting things around.
Kofi loved not only my body, but me as a person even in my messy state. He didn't know what he had done for me. I was grateful and hoped I could live up to his positive thoughts about me. Why he hadn't come into my life earlier was a question that occurred to me last night, but I guess the best time was now, when I needed him most. The thought of needing anyone frightened me, but Kofi's solid presence was reassuring. He'd proven he was the real deal, so I had no reason to doubt him.
The door opened and he walked into the bedroom, wearing swimming trunks and a towel. Smiling, he came to my side. "I'd ask if you slept well, but your snoring kept me up half the night."
I sat up, dragging the sheet over my chest and ignoring the hand he held out to me. "Right. You were the one snoring like a buzz saw."
He laughed while I climbed out of bed in an undignified heap. "You Jamaican girls are touchy in the morning."
"Which makes me wonder which other Jamaican girls you've been sleeping with."
He pulled me to him, wetting my skin. "You're so full of energy, Miss Chin, I could barely stay afloat while swimming."
I sucked my teeth and moved past him. "You're for later. What's for breakfast?"
Kofi shrugged. "How would I know? I'm not in the habit of walking into people's kitchen and asking what they're cooking."
My wave was dismissive. "Never mind."
He blew me a kiss as he picked up his phone off the dresser. "Hurry up. I need to shower too."
"You could always join me," I said, giving him a wicked grin and sashaying into the bathroom.
When Kofi opened the door and stepped into the enclosure behind me, I had squirted bath gel on my bath puff. I turned, sliding my arms up over his shoulders. "I wondered if you were going to take all day."
"Not with an invitation like that."
He took the nylon ball from my hand, running it over my skin in circles but avoiding my erogenous zones. By the time he was done slathering me with soap from my neck to my feet, I was dying for him to touch me in the areas that cried out for his attention.
While he stood in front of me, using his hands like a washcloth over my breasts, I arched my back to get closer to him and when he nudged my thighs open with his knee, mine went liquid. After sensuously washing me in that most intimate of places using his bare hand, I could barely stand up straight.
That bath was the longest, most erotic and exhausting experience I'd ever had inside the four walls of a shower stall. While caressing me in ways nobody ever had, Kofi amplified that exquisite experience by pleasuring me from behind until I thought I'd burst from the agony of not being able to touch him as I came.
Our lovemaking delayed our arrival at breakfast. The others were halfway through when we sat at the table.
Vance held Brianna above his head while she kicked her feet toward him. The moment Vance's eyes landed on me, I rolled mine. "Don’t start."
"I wasn't going to say a word," he said, peeking at me from behind Brianna's chunky body.
Half joking, I shot back, "You better not, if you know what's good for you."
