All the air leaves my lungs as I rake my fingers through my hair, pulling on it as the vision of them together dances through my head.
I refuse to even acknowledge the possibility even though I know it’s there, so I say, “I don’t think she’s the type to give it up that easily, so three months is nothing. But she hasn’t been this wasted, maybe ever . . .”
“Fuck,” Jace says beside me.
“Yeah,” I sigh.
“No matter what, though, he’s her boyfriend,” Damon says, clapping me on the back. “And you just have to trust that Tatum knows what she’s doing.”
Chapter 10
TATUM
My head buzzes as Ethan pulls into the lot of Oakridge Hall and parks. I grapple with the door, growling in frustration when I can’t seem to get it open.
Chuckling, Ethan gets out and rounds the car, opening the passenger door easily and offering me his arm when he sees I’m unsteady on my feet.
With a small smile, I hook my arm in his, clinging to him like a baby sloth as he guides us inside and to my dorm room with ease.
Why the hell did I drink so much?The question bounces around inside my head as I struggle with my keys.
The hallway spins, and I stumble, the key missing the lock entirely when Ethan’s arm tightens around my waist, steadying me. “Easy,” he says, his tone amused. “Why don’t you let me do this?” He gently removes the keys from my loosened grip.
Within seconds, he has the door open and is guiding me inside my suite and to my bedroom, where I flop down on my small bed with a sigh.
The ride here was mostly quiet, and even though I’m completely wasted, it’s not lost on me how upset he must be.
My thoughts drift back to the party. To the shock of seeing Brandon’s body in the moonlight. To the look of challenge in his eyes when he asked Ethan if he trusted me with him, and the way Ethan’s dark eyes hardened in return when I admitted I once had a crush on my best friend.
Shit. Why did I have to go and get shit-faced?
My stupid crush was a secret never meant to be shared. One I’d kept in the darkest, deepest recesses of my mind.
But I’m not a liar. Even drunk. And now I have to deal with the cost of my honesty.
The little crease in his brow tells me he’s lost in thought as he kicks off his shoes, then kneels in front of me, unbuckling my sandals without asking. One by one, he places them on the floor by my desk, and I hate that he’s being so sweet when I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve him.
What kind of girlfriend ogles her best friend right in front of her boyfriend? And,God, I had ogled him.I’ve seen Brandon in swim trunks a hundred times over the years, but I never remembered his body looking likethat. Like Polykleitos himself had carved him from marble. I probably would’ve stayed like that, frozen as I drank him in, had Ethan not whispered in my ear that I was embarrassing both myself and him by staring.
Every second that passes without us speaking feels like a loaded gun—quiet now, but seconds away from going off.
Without a word, he drags the desk chair across from us closer to my bed and sits, far enough away that I can feel the distance, close enough to reach out and touch if I wanted.
The tension stretches between us like a rubber band until I can no longer take it. “I know you’re upset,” I start, unsure of how to broach this, wishing again I were sober. “Maybe we should talk about it.”
“You mean, about the fact that you admitted you once had feelings for your best friend? The one person you spend all your time with when I’m not around?”
I bite my lip and glance away. “It was a long time ago.”
“High school wasn’t that long ago.”
“Ethan . . .” I plead, reaching for him and panicking when he pulls away. “We’re friends, that’s all. We’ve never been more than that.”
He glances away from me, like he can’t stand the sight of me. The muscle in his cheek tightens and it feels like minutes before he finally says, “Then maybe you should tell that to him.”
I laugh before I realize my mistake, because Brandon has never thought of me as anything other than a friend. In fact, I’m the complete opposite of the girls he’s into. But Ethan’s entirely serious.
“Brandon doesn’t like girls like me,” I say when he doesn’t laugh.
