Unconsciously, I circle my thumb on his leg. This conversation is in no way going the way I’d planned.
“I hope you are like this forever. I like you this way,” I reply with quiet conviction.
“Nate,” he says, exasperated.
“I feel like I’ve been pretty clear about what I want. You’ve done your due diligence, so now I have all the information, and guess what? I still want you. I still like you.”
Marcos turns to stare sightlessly out the windshield, so I bite my tongue and hold back from saying more. After a few minutes of silence, he drops his hand down to rest on top of mine and I know I’ve won. I’m not prone to low moods, so this bit of contact alone is enough to put a smile back on my face. Marcos glances over.
“Okay,” he says.
“Okay?” I repeat. He nods. “Good, because I was starting to feel like a stalker. This is my first experience with fixation, and I wasn’t expecting it to feel quite so creepy.”
Snorting, he pushes open his door and slides out of the car. When I follow and meet him on the other side, we walk shoulder to shoulder up to his door.
“You were being pretty creepy,” he admits.
“Well, you did this to me.” Following him inside, I put myshoes by the door and head toward his bedroom. He laughs softly behind me, a short, happy sound, as though he likes that I remember which room is his. As if I could ever forget where his bedroom is located.
“I need to shower,” he tells me, trailing me into his room and pulling off his socks. His room is in the same sort of partial disarray that it was last time, straddling the line between messy and clean. The accounting homework is gone from his desk.
“Okay. Want me to join you?” I ask, mostly kidding but also a little bit serious. He shakes his head immediately.
“No. I’ll be quick, though.”
Not letting myself feel disappointed by that, I take a seat on his bed. “I’ll wait here.”
Humming a little to myself, I pull out my phone when I hear the shower turn on. There’s a text from Micky, which reminds me that I haven’t checked in with him today. He’s so alone here, I always try and reach out to him as often as possible. I’d feel like absolute shit if I found out he was lonely or unhappy, and I could have done something about it.
Micky
Hey Nate, how was the baseball game?
Nate
It was fun! You’ve got to come with me sometime. You could meet Marcos!!
My boyfriend.
Micky
Ah I see congratulations are in order.
Nate
The secret to getting a man to go out with you is low level stalking.
Micky
Incidentally, that is also the secret to getting a felony.
Nate
Ha!
I’m at his place right now.
I’m pretty happy.
