My chest cracks open, and now my tears won’t stop.
I think about Walker standing in his bedroom this morning, telling me he was choosing me. Telling me he wasn’t going anywhere. Asking me to be brave enough to choose him back. I think about the way it melted my heart.
And then I ran. Just like I always have.
Walker stayed when Lucy’s mother left. Walker built a life out of being left behind. Walker hung Christmas lights in the freezing cold because it made his daughter’s face light up. He cooked chili for a stranger because she was stranded in a storm. He looked at me like I was something precious, even when I was doing everything in my power to push him away.
And I’m about to become another person who leaves him. My stomach bubbles, and the thought makes me sick. I yank the handle, but the door doesn’t open.
“Ugh, what kind of car requires a key these days? The fob is in here. Open up, dammit.”
I pull again, and when nothing happens, I dig into my massive bag in search of the key. So much for a quick getaway. My tears are coming hot and fast now, my vision blurring.
No wonder Danner is unrecognizable. I’ve only been here two days, and look what this place is doing to me. I’m a mess.
“Fuck you, stupid Texas rental car from the past.”
When I can’t take any more, I press my forehead against the cold metal of the door and finally let myself break. I stand there like an idiot and let myself feel everything I’ve been running from. The loneliness, the fear, the desperate aching want for something I convinced myself I could never have.
“Eliza?”
I spin around and swipe at my eyes.
Lucy is standing ten feet away. She’s still in her pajamas, a coat thrown hastily over her shoulders. She’s staring at me wide-eyed. Her sparkly green nails catch the light. Her hair is a wild tangle. And her face is full of so much hope it stops my heart.
“You didn’t leave yet,” she breathes. “I saw you from the window at Patty June’s house. This is her jacket, not mine. I was worried you were leaving, so I came down to see you.” She takes a shaky breath. “Please don’t go. We’re going to do so many fun Christmas things. You won’t want to miss them.”
“Lucy—”
“I know you like my dad. He likes you, too, I can tell. It’s weird because I’ve never seen him like anyone in my whole life. My mom left before I can remember. I always kind of dreaded it because I wasn’t sure how it would be to have him love another person. But then you came here, and you’re so cool. It’s so easy to like you and he… he’s so happy.”
I can’t speak. I can barely breathe.
She scuffs her boot in the gravel. “But sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have one. A mom, I mean.” Her eyesmeet mine, bright and earnest. “I think you’d be a really good one because you’re tough, you know—and smart.”
The words hit me like a physical blow.
I’ve tried so hard all my life to make people believe I am tough and smart. I’ve always wanted to be chosen. And now, in my weakest moment, here they are… my people. They aren’t asking me to wait or to prove myself. Walker and Lucy are choosing me.
I want to be brave enough to choose them back.
I inhale and blow out a shaky breath.
“Lucy.” My voice cracks. “Can you do something for me?”
She nods so hard her whole body moves.
“Can you go get your dad?”
Her face splits into a grin so wide it rivals the sunrise. She’s already running toward the cabin before I finish the sentence, boots slapping against the gravel and yelling, “DAD, COME OUTSIDE!” at the top of her lungs.
I wipe my face with the back of my hand and let out a shaky chuckle. If the whole ranch didn’t see me marching around with my suitcase earlier, they sure as hell will see me now. My mascara is probably a disaster. My hair is a mess. I’m still wearing Walker’s flannel under my coat, wrinkled from sleeping in it.
But I’ve never felt more like myself.
A few moments later, Walker appears—shirtless, jeans hastily pulled on, looking like he just rolled out of bed. His eyes find Lucy, running toward him. Then they find me.
He goes completely still.
