It could have been minutes, but it felt like we stood there for hours, our tongues tangling, my fingers exploring, my head trying to make sense of the feelings flooding my system.
Marlowe pulled back first. Her chest rose and fell as she tried to catch her breath. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry? For what?”
Her eyes drifted closed, and she tucked her chin. “You don’t have to kiss me to try to make me feel better.”
A lightning bolt of anger struck the center of my chest. “You think that’s why I kissed you? Because I feel sorry for you?”
She didn’t look at me.
“Answer me, Lo Lo.” I nudged her chin up, forcing her to meet my gaze.
“Don’t you?” Her voice came out soft and quiet.
I put my palms on the counter on either side of her ass, trapping her in place. “You have no idea, do you?”
Her forehead creased for a quick moment, then smoothed out again. “No idea about what?”
“Look at me. I want your eyes on mine when I tell you this.” I waited as she bit down on her bottom lip and slowly lifted her gaze to lock onto mine.
“I’ve always wanted you, Lo Lo. From the first day of ninth grade when you sat down in front of me in homeroom. You were the only one who didn’t look at me like a piece of trash. The only one who treated me like I was somebody. Hell,”—I shifted my gaze to a spot on the wall behind her before my emotions got the best of me—“you were everything to me.”
She squished my cheeks together and directed my gaze back to hers. “Why didn’t you say something back then?”
“And risk losing you as a friend?” She didn’t get it. The stars were aligned the day Marlowe was born. She grew up in a loving family with both of her parents, surrounded by friends who only wanted the best for her.
We couldn’t be more different if we tried. While she was learning how to ride a bike on her grandma’s drive, I was trying to stay invisible, so I didn’t draw the attention of whichever loser my mom was living with at the time.
“You’d never lose me.” She let her hand fall away from my face.
“But I did.” Even though it had been years, the pain was still just as fresh, like having a knife carve through my chest. “You headed off to college and never looked back.” I was so fucking proud of her for getting into a big college like Northwestern. She was meant for greater things than hanging around Mustang Mountain and trying to figure out what the hell to do with the rest of her life.
She glanced down, her bottom lip quivering like she was about to cry. “I’m sorry. I got caught up in college life, and it seemed like we grew apart. Then, when my parents and grandma moved to Florida, I didn’t have a reason to come back.”
“I understood. Why would you want to hang onto a guy like me who would hold you back when you had so much going for you?” The truth stung, but there it was. My whole life, everyone told me I wouldn’t amount to anything. I’d always felt like my future was predetermined. Until Marlowe made me think I could do anything.
Anger flashed in her eyes. “I never thought you would hold me back. In fact, I actually remember inviting you to come with me.”
“And do what?” I spread my arms open. “Live on the street and meet up with you for lunch every once in a while? I was making about ten bucks an hour. How was I supposed to be able to move to Chicago and support myself with just a high school diploma? I don’t want to fight, Lo. The past is gone. All that matters now is what we do with the future. Why did you come back to Mustang Mountain?”
She took in a deep breath and faced me, her blue eyes bright. “I came back because of you.”
“Me?” I expected her to say she missed the mountains or came to her senses and realized she belonged in a small town instead of the big city. The last thing I expected was for her to say she came back for me.
“Things were going well. I loved my job and had been seeing someone pretty seriously. He even proposed in front of his entire family, so I felt like I had to say yes.”
My chest squeezed at the mention of her fiance. But she was here with me now, and there was no ring on her finger, so I wanted to know how that had come to pass. “Go on.”
“I was starting to get everything I’d always wanted.” One shoulder lifted in a slight shrug. “Only it didn’t feel how I thought it would, you know?”
“Why not?”
She put her hands on my shoulders and stared into my eyes. “Because he wasn’t you.”
CHAPTER 6
MARLOWE
