“You’re working too hard,” Marcus says, coming up to me and putting his arms around me.It’s an easy gesture, but I still tense in response to it.He clearly senses my response, because he lets go of me, backing away.“I’m sorry, I should have realized it was still too soon for you.”
He knows about me and Alaric, of course, and he’s made it his mission to help distract me from the pain of that loss.Or maybe just to remind me that I have him now.
I shake my head.“You don’t need to apologize.I should.I’m just…”
“You’re hurt,” Marcus says.“You don’t need to explain it, Lyra.But you do need to stop hiding from everything you feel by throwing yourself into your work.”
“Even when it helps make sure the renewed games will be perfect?”I counter.I struggle to keep my feelings from showing.Marcus is right: I’m hurt.Alaric and I were drifting apart, but that doesn’t mean I’d stopped caring about him.When he walked away, it felt as though he took a piece of my heart with him.
“Even then,” Marcus says.His arms aren’t around me now, but he does put his hands on my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes.“The games are important to me, Lyra, but you’re important too.I don’t want you to run yourself into the ground, and I can’t stand the thought of you being hurt like this.I know you cared for Alaric, and it will take time for you to get over that.But I hope you’ll see in time that it’s for the best.The games will be fine.Why don’t you come back to my villa?I don’t want you to be alone right now.”
My first instinct is to say no, because I want to stay here.I want to keep working, to distract myself.Failing that, I want to go back to my rooms in the palace, to sit there alone, surrounded only by my pain.
But there's something about Marcus' touch on my skin that keeps me from sinking into my pain.He leads me from the Colosseum, and I'm surprised to find that it's growing dark.Have I really been working in there so long?Have I really been that focused on the preparations, and on fighting back the tears that otherwise threaten to sneak up on me whenever I stop.
I head out into the city with him, walking back under the moonlight.There are no guards around us now, but I still feel safe, and perhaps a part of me welcomes the prospect of someone waiting out there in the dark to ambush us.I can still remember the feeling of triumph from beating the men who tried to attack me, and doing something like that again would only help with the pain I feel.
But no one does attack us.Instead, it's calm and pleasant as Marcus and I stroll through the city, to the spot between the noble and merchant quarters where his villa is located.We head inside, going through to one of the main rooms, where his servants are already moving to set wine and food on low table.There's too much for just him.
“You were expecting me to come back with you,” I say.
“Hoping, not expecting,” Marcus says.He gestures to a couch, sitting beside me on it, his leg touching mine as we eat and drink.He lifts a cup of wine.“To everything you've done to make the games a reality.”
I touch my goblet to his.“Will they be a success, do you think?Will everyone be safe?”
Marcus places his hand over mine.“You've done everything you can, and I truly believe that this will go perfectly.I couldn't have done this without you, Lyra.I hope you understand just how important you are to the city… and to me.”
I flush at the compliment.I can feel how close Marcus is to me, and after our kiss on the palace roof, it's impossible to deny that I'm attracted to him.
“We've only known each other a short time,” I point out.It seems strange that I should mean so much to him, so quickly.
“And in that time you've more than lived up to everything I've ever heard about you.I knew even before he came here that you were brave and powerful, but since you've been back in the city, you've shown that you're compassionate, that you care about the city and its people.I've seen with my own eyes your intelligence, your determination… and your beauty.”
He leans closer to me, our wine forgotten, and for just a moment I hesitate.
“Alaric-” I begin.
“Alaric isn't here,” Marcus points out.“I am, and you are.And I think there's something between us.If you don't want anything to happen tonight, I'll understand, but I want to share this moment with you.I wantyou, Lyra.”
He reaches out to touch the side of my face, turning me to him as he leans forward to kiss me.The kiss starts gently, almost a question against my lips, asking me if I want this.I do.Despite everything I feel in the wake of Alaric leaving me in the city, I want this.I want Marcus.I think I need him right now, see in him the best way to turn some of the things I feel into something positive.
I respond to his kiss deepening it, giving in to the passion of the moment.Somewhere in it we stand, and he lifts me from my feet, heading in the direction of one of the villa’s bedrooms.He pauses at the threshold.
“Do you want this, Lyra?”he asks me.
I answer him with another passionate kiss.“Yes.”
***
I'm not sure what time it is.I've been lying awake for hours now.Certainly, it's still night, the moon high above, the stars still gleaming.Marcus is lying beside me, deep in sleep.I look at him, feeling a wash of joy at what we've done this evening, but also feeling the same worries as before, starting to run up through me.
I can't help thinking about the games, and it's not just as a distraction from what I feel.The inaugural event of the reformed games will be tomorrow, and my nerves are buzzing around me, refusing to let me rest.
I know I could wake Marcus, talk with him about my concerns, or find another way for us both to distract one another, but that wouldn't be fair to him.Tomorrow is his big day, with the games he's organized finally coming to fruition.He needs to be rested for that.
I rise from the bed because I can't lie there any longer.I dress and pad from the room, making my way through the silent villa, not sure where I'm going at first.When I reach its door though, I know.I won't be able to rest until I make the last checks on the Colosseum.If I can't sleep anyway, I might as well use the night, making sure everything's perfect.
So I slip from the villa, moving through the darkness of the city towards the great form of the Colosseum.I'm not sure if I've seen it up close by night before.Always I was brought there during the day, and then taken back to Ironhold at night.Now, I head inside, past the guards keeping out anyone who might try to interfere with the games.I move through the colosseum, wanting to check every aspect of the games one more time.
