Arla cocks her head to one side.“Are you really asking me that, Alaric?You know Lyra.You know she’s someone who can’t stop herself from doing the right thing, however hard it is.Did you think she was going to stay here if the capital needed her help?”
“IfRowanneeded her help,” I reply.
“Jealousy doesn’t suit you, dear,” Arla says.
“Really?”I counter.“I think I’m pretty good at it.”
“Tell me, why did you stay?”
“Because I didn’t want to be dragged back into it all,” I reply.“Because I know that if I go, I’ll end up sucked into a world of violence and scheming.I got out.Wegot out, me and Lyra.”
“And it hurt you that she decided to go back, even without you?”Arla says.
That hits too close to home, and I can’t bring myself to answer.I’ve always retreated into arrogance and dark humor when things are difficult, but I suspect neither will truly work with Lyra’s mother.
“You know,” she says, “I thought that if either of you was going to leave for the city without the other, it would be you, Alaric.”
“Well, maybe you don’t know me,” I shoot back.
She smiles.“I suspect I know you better than you know yourself.You could have built a life for yourself here.You could have used those illusions of yours to tell stories, or helped with fishing and hunting.You didn’t, because you didn’t want to put down roots.You’d rather be in Aetheria; you’re just worried about what you’ll be drawn into if you’re there.You love the city life, the action, the people, all of it.If you could go back there and live the life of a noble with no schemes or violence or problems, I’m sure you would.Are you that determined to leave my daughter to deal with things there alone?”
I sigh, standing.Again, everything she’s saying hits too close to home.I can’t be here, because it will hurt too much.“You’re going to lecture me as long as I sit here, aren’t you?”
“And now you’re trying to push me away because it’s hard to deal with the truth,” Arla says.“Just think about it, Alaric.”
I walk out of the tavern without replying.I ignore Ella’s look as I go, because that isn’t the solution I need tonight.I’m just not sure what Idoneed.I walk back to the small house I share,shared, with Lyra, but I don’t go inside.
Instead, I sit on the beach, staring at the waves, trying to think.
Arla was right about so much.I don’t belong here.I’m not made for small villages, for peace, for the simple life.Even Lyra only made it just bearable.Trying to live this life with her drove a wedge between us, and I’m not sure if we’re even a couple anymore.
I sit, staring at the stars, trying to work out what I should do.As I do so, I hear a bird calling, a raven’s croak coming to me through the dark.It catches me by surprise, especially when the bird flutters out of the night to land before me.It stands on the sand, staring at me through eyes that glitter black in the light of the moon.
It takes me several seconds to realize that there’s nothing natural about the way it’s standing there, staring at me.I know one person who can make a bird fly straight to me, stand before me, stare at me like this:
Lyra.
I look closer at the bird, and that’s when I spot a folded scrap of parchment tied to its leg.Lyra has sent me a message, and I pluck it from the bird’s leg without hesitation.The bird flutters its wings and then flies away, presumably freed from Lyra’s control.
I unroll the scrap of parchment, reading it by the light of the moon.
Alaric,
I hope you're well, and that everything is good in Seatide.I wish you'd come with me, but I get why you didn't.I might be in Aetheria longer than I thought.There are so many things wrong with the city, and I have been offered a position on Aetheria's Senate to try to make a difference.I think that I have to accept.It's my best chance to help people here.I care about you, but I must do this.I must stay.
I screw up the message into a ball, tossing it out into the ocean in my anger.Lyra says that she cares for me, but in the next breath tells me that she won’t be returning to me?It’s as good as saying that things are done between us.
What should I do now?Should I just get on with my life here in Seatide?Should I go and find Ella after all, even if it means having to beat her hunter boyfriend senseless later?I laugh at the thought, but it's short-lived.
Well then, I could head off and wander the world, going from place to place without ever settling, trading on my fame and my skills.It’s tempting, but instinctively, it feels wrong.
I can’t just abandon Lyra like that.She says she’s taking a position as a senator, which means she’ll be plunged into all the worst of the scheming, against enemies who won’t stand opposite her on the sands for her to kill.
I might have argued with her, but I want her to be safe.I need to protect Lyra, and I can’t do it from here, in Seatide.As much as I’m worried about going back, I have no other choice.I need to return to Aetheria.
CHAPTER ELEVEN: LYRA
“Is all this really necessary?”I ask Rowan as a servant wraps me in a white toga.He and Marcus are watching every moment of the process, and I can’t help watching the way their eyes flick to one another, as if each suspects the other of trying to see more than he should.
