Turned out I wasn’t good at being unemployed. Three in the afternoon and I would have had a strategy written out with plans for execution across all departments I was connected to. Instead I had a panic attack. Call me a workaholic, but I liked strategy outlines better.
I had my phone in front of me, waiting for responses—Bridget had told me she would take care of it all and that I could just relax, but I couldn’t possibly put that whole thing on her, notwhen we’d been work friends at most. Sure, she’d always been reliable and friendly, and she respected me in a way most people didn’t—I never felt like I had to prove myself despite being a woman in front of her—and she’d come to mind as the person most likely to help me back in my hometown, but only because nobody else would have helped me at all. An assumption borne out by my own attempts to find anything further: a few messages sent to old family friends and the like, each one as painful as peeling my fingernails off, each one returning nothing.
And each one a mistake, because I could only assume that was how word got back, and my phone lit up with a call from Mom right as I had lifted my cup to my lips, and I choked on coffee. After taking a second to cough and clear my throat in not the most dignified fashion, I faced down the phone like I would my executioner.
She must have known I was attending to messages rapidly all day. She’d know I ignored her call. Would if I had the strength. I clenched my jaw, and I picked up the phone.
“Mom—”
“I hear you’re coming home.”
“I’ve been considering my options, is all,” I lied. “Nothing concrete. I didn’t want to tell you before I had anything specific figured out.”
“It’s just as well you did,” she said, her voice light. “I knew you wouldn’t like Seattle.”
“Seattle—it’s lovely here, Mom, it’s just the job that didn’t—”
“We’ll get started with converting the office to a bedroom. It won’t be a long-term solution, but I hear you’re only looking for a place to land for a few months while you’re house-shopping.”
I wondered iffinding an apartmenthad gone through the game of telephone to turn intohouse-shoppingor if that wasMom trying to insert the idea into the narrative. “That won’t be necessary,” I said a little too quickly. “I’ve been looking into other places, it’s…”
“Don’t be daft,” she said with a short laugh. “We’re your family. It’s only reasonable.”
“Grandpa likes his quiet. I know he likes having me around, but I wouldn’t want to disturb him constantly. I’ll be in the neighborhood, but I’ll stay—”
“Victoria, please,” she scoffed. “I hear you’re moving at the end of the week. If you haven’t found something, you won’t find it that fast. We’ll have the office converted. Let us know when you have an arrival time.”
“I… I have found something,” I blurted. I didn’t know why. I guess I’d just book a hotel for a week while I went frantically searching. Mother would never let me hear the end of it if she found out I was in a hotel. But I didn’t have another way out. Mother was quiet for a second before she said,
“Have you?”
“It’s with a, er, a friend.”
“A friend, hm?”
I didn’t understand the tone in her voice. “An old friend, from work. Her name’s Bridget. She lives up in Merrimount.”
“Mm-hm.” She was quiet for a minute. “And you’d rather stay with your friend.”
My throat tightened. “I don’t want to feel like I’m a bother to anyone. Please. It’s for my own sake as much as anyone’s. It’s… er, well. It’s for my dignity. Things ended undignifiedly here, and I want to do this for myself. To help salvage my pride.”
She was quiet for a long time before she said, her voice oddly more cheerful now, sounding forced, “Well, you’ll be in the neighborhood to celebrate the holidays with us.”
“Yes—of course.” I’d have to find an excuse not to. If Bridget did help me find a place, maybe she had work shewanted done on her apartment. I could keep busy doing renovations. Mother would be more likely to respectsorry, I can’t make it, I’m doing too much hard work.
“Well, I’m glad for your friend Bridget, then,” she said, and my throat tightened. Mother was nosy. If she went pulling up information about Bridget, she’d find out I wasn’t living with her after all, and then what?
But for everything today was, Bridget remained a ray of light in the darkness, because another call came in, Bridget’s name on it. I laughed at the sheer serendipity. “Me too,” I said breathlessly. “She’s actually calling right now, so—”
“Well, go on, then,” Mother said, a strained tone in her voice, and I got in rushed goodbyes before I hung up, answering Bridget’s call.
“Hi—hello, this is Victoria.”
“Hi,” Bridget said, her voice sounding surprised. I’d been a little surprised by hers initially too—she sounded different than she had back in the office. More… relaxed? “Everything okay? You sound rushed.”
“I had just been in another call. It isn’t important. Is something the matter?”
She paused. “So, there’s a, uh… there’s this place.”
