His mother’s mouth tightens again, but after a moment she and Jacob’s father rise to their feet.
“Do you want ice?” she asks Jacob. I fight the urge to scowl at her. Jacob doesn’t like ice in his water.
“Whatever,” Jacob mumbles.
“Okay, love.” She leans over and kisses his forehead, and then they’re gone.
I let out a heavy breath and reach for Jacob’s hand, but he pulls away. He meets my eye for the first time since I walked in, and his expression makes my blood run cold.
I swallow. “What’s wrong?”
His eyes drop down to his hands again. The silence stretches out so long I start to think he’s not going to answer. Finally, he shrugs one shoulder. “I think we should cool it for a while.”
For a second, I can hear absolutely nothing, not even the thud of my pulse. “What?”
He picks at a loose thread on the bedsheet. “I think we should... take a break, or whatever.”
I’m too stunned to speak. It’s like the whole world’s tilted sideways.
“You don’t mean that.” I reach for his hand again, and this time he doesn’t flinch away, but his fingers are cold and rigid beneath mine. “I know it’s been a mess with your parents,” I say in a rush, “but I can fix that. They just need some time, I can talk to them again—”
“I don’t want you to talk to them again.” A drop of—something—is creeping into Jacob’s voice. I tighten my grip on his hand and his eyes flash. This time, when he speaks, the anger is undeniable. “And it’s got nothing to do with them.”
There’s a painful hollow forming in the center of my chest. “Okay.” I try to sound calm, like I’m not about to fall apart. “What is it, then?”
“For fuck’s sake.” He pulls his hand out of mine and scrubs his fingers over his forehead. “I just don’t want to do this anymore, Travis.” The curt, dismissive way he says my name feels like a blow. “Look, we always had an expiration date, alright? I know you think this is so fucking serious, but that’s just because you’ve never dated anyone before.”
My chest hurts so badly, I can hardly breathe. “We are serious.”
He rolls his eyes, and something inside of me fractures. “This isn’t that big a deal, alright?”
“Isn’t a big deal?” I repeat. “I’ve been worrying about you for weeks. I’ve barely slept—I had to lie to the team—”
“No one asked you to do that.”
“I almostlostyou.”
Jacob lets out an awful, scornful breath. “Lost me,” he repeats. “I’m not your fucking property.”
I can’t think of anything to say to that. I just stare at him, with my heart bleeding out inside my chest.
In the silence, the door slides open and a nurse comes in, humming cheerfully.
“I have your medicine,” she says in a thick French accent, handing Jacob a tiny cup of pills and a glass of water. She watches him take them, smiling at me, unaware of the tension between us. “Can I get you anything?” she asks after Jacob’s taken the pills.
“No, thanks,” he mutters.
She lingers in the room, fiddling with Jacob’s heart monitor and then stepping away to refill the boxes of gloves that hang near the door.
“Why are you doing this?” I ask in a low, strangled voice.
Jacob’s cheeks redden, and for a second I think he’s upset that he’s hurt me. Then his eyes flick to the nurse and I realize he isn’t upset. He’sembarrassed.
Embarrassed of me.
I thought I’d learned what heartbreak was, these last few weeks, but this pain is utterly unbearable.
“I don’t understand,” I say hoarsely. “If I did something wrong—”
