I promise. I’ll make the pain go away. And I swear on all the Gods, no one else will hurt you. No one else will lay a fucking finger on you. I’m going to take care of you, Rhyan. I swear!
But he’d been so out of it when I swore, and in so much pain, I wasn’t even sure if he’d heard me. If he knew what I’d promised. If he knew I’d broken it. It didn’t matter. Because I knew. I remembered.
And I’d failed him. I’d lied. He had been hurt again—and in the end, I hadn’t taken care of him. And that … that was going to be one of my last memories. One of my last moments. Rhyan dying, in excruciating pain, being offered an empty promise. From someone he trusted and loved. Me.
“Lyriana?” Sean asked. “Please. I can’t take it anymore. I beg you. What happened to him. Where’s my nephew?”
“He was,” I said. “He was stri—” My voice cracked. I felt dizzy. I was trying, but I couldn’t get the words out but I knew I needed to. Sean was the one person in Rhyan’s family he most trusted after his mother. He was the only real parent figure he had left, who actually loved him, cared for him. Sean was the first person who deserved to know. Rhyan would want him to know. And, I knew he’d want me to be the one to tell him. But the words were stuck in my throat. I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. I felt faint, and like the grief was going to swallow me whole again. Auriel and I had barely discussed what happened. And I wasn’t ready. Wasn’t ready to talk about it. To say it.
“Sean,” Auriel said, stepping forward. “Do you maybe want to sit down?”
Sean shook his head violently. “I do not.”
“You might wish to,” Auriel said gently.
“Just say it,” Branwyn said. “We need to hear. He needs to hear.” She’d taken Sean’s hand, and he was holding onto her so tightly, his knuckles had whitened.
I met Sean’s eyes, every part of me shaking. “Sean, he— um—he—” My vision blurred. Fuck. I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it. Couldn’t say it.
Auriel took my hand, and cleared his throat. “I’m so sorry, Sean, to have to tell you. But, Rhyan was caught using his vorakh in the capital. He was tried and sentenced, then stripped in the arena,” Auriel said.
“NO!” Sean yelled. “No. It can’t be. Can’t be true.”
Branwyn cried out.
The tears started falling down my face again, my vision swimming in and out of focus as my stomach pinched in pain.
“Did he—” Sean started, his eyes full of unshed tears. “Did he—oh, Godsdamned fucking damnit. I know it’s rare but, did he … Did he survive it?”
“The stripping,” I whispered, and nodded my head carefully. “He was so strong, and so brave,” I swallowed. “He survived that.”
The look of relief in Sean’s face was fleeting before his eyes narrowed. “What do you mean—he survivedthat?”
“I tried to save him. I killed the Blade to get to him.” My voice broke. “I killed everyone in my path. But there were too many. And I was too slow. He was alive at the end, but just barely. His magic was … they took it. They took it all. I,” I sniffled. “So I carried him from the stage. I was going to get him to safety, heal him, heal all his injuries. But we were trapped in the arena, and we couldn’t … we couldn’t get out—” My voice caught, “the attack.”
“The vorakh attack?” Branwyn asked.
“There was no vorakh attack,” I said. “It was …” I pressed my head in my hands. I couldn’t bear to be the one to tell Sean the truth, to break his heart like mine had been.
Auriel placed a hand on my shoulder, squeezing gently. “The Emperor’s lying about the vorakh. The arena was overrun by akadim.”
“Akadim?” Sean asked. His eyes widened. “He’s killed plenty before. He’s strong.”
Branwyn wrapped an arm around his waist, her bottom lip shaking.
“He was.” Auriel took a deep breath. “So strong. Just not at that moment. I’m sorry. He was turned. He’s one of them now.”
Sean sank to his knees, his mouth opened, but no sound came out. Branwyn crouched beside her husband, wrapping her arms around him, her face buried in his neck. The look on his face was too much, too raw. Too full of horror and grief. Too painful. I knew the feeling—knew it too fucking well. Knew my face looked the same when I realized what had happened. When I realized I’d been too late.
I wanted to go to Sean. To comfort him. And at the same time, I wanted to throw myself at his feet and beg for forgiveness because I should have stopped it. I should have been faster. Taken Dario with me. Not bothered with the orange fucking shard. Not dealt with Morgana. I should have gone straight into the arena. I could have made a thousand different choices. And surely, surely, one of them was the one that would have saved Rhyan’s life. But I didn’t know which one. And it was going to haunt me. For now, all I could do was sob, my body swaying. My arm …
A thunderous pounding on the door pulled me back from my thoughts.
“Turion check. Open up!” The voice boomed all the way down to the basement.
Branwyn’s eyes widened. “It’s Turion Kevel. What do I do?”
Sean’s nostrils flared, as he inhaled a sharp intake of breath, and wiped his eyes. “I’ll answer it, come with me, love—so they’re not suspicious.”
