The brown of the child’s eyes deepened before their eyebrows lifted into something that felt like surprise, but quickly devolved into anger. They pulled the edges of their blankets tighter around their small body, their hair falling in brown curls around their shoulders. “You said you had no choice. But what is it that you have done? What am I?”
Asherah held my gaze, her eyes watering, before she answered. “You were part of the God known as Shiviel, Guardian of the Yellow Ray. Now you’re not. Now you’re new.”
“New?” they asked, their voice filling with horror. “I’m not new. I can feel it. I’m ancient. I always was. I can feel where you cut … where you cut me apart. I remember. Remember too much.” Again they shook their head. “I can’t be new. I’ve been here for so long. If I were new, I wouldn’t have died. I wouldn’t have felt it. My death.” Their chest heaved, and I began to fully regret whatwe’d done. Had the price of weakening Shiviel been worth this? But if we hadn’t, he would have destroyed us all. And after his betrayal of Moriel, his power was too great, too uncontained, too wild. Too dangerous.
“You’re right,” I said. “You are ancient. We were brothers once. We protected each other. And I swear I will protect you now. I will amend this. You don’t have to be afraid.”
“Why should I believe you?” They spat, and for a moment, their brown eyes fell on Shiviel’s body. “I sense memories. Of another world. Another plane of existence. Of light. A light that did not burn.” The child shook their head. “But I am not Shiviel. Not anymore. I am … other.” They stared at their hands, before looking up at Asherah. Their eyes flashed with a glowing, yellow light. “What you did, I don’t remember. But I know this much. You’re unforgiven. You won’t survive.”
A light flashed. Asherah screamed beside me. Her body glowed, alight with gold, and red. Until she was the flame. She was the fire.
And I was losing her.
I sputtered, coming to, my mouth filled with rain water, my entire body drenched and freezing. The sun was rising, and I turned over on my side, groaning. Fuck. I’d fallen asleep, I’d spent the entire night out here, sleeping beside the seraphim. In the distance, the clock tower began to yell, alerting me to the late hour. Gryphons soared overhead, their wings like dark shadows in the faint morning sun, and in the mountains, lightning struck.
I grunted, attempting to sit up as thunder rumbled and a fresh bout of rain fell in chilled droplets around me. I had to get inside, finish getting ready. We were leaving for Numeria. But I could barely move. My entire body was stiff from the cold and rain. I needed to find paper, to write this down, to remember. Because finally, finally, I’dremembered something else, something new. Another piece of the puzzle.
Shiviel’s soul had been split in half. That was why he was weakened. The reason why Kane had no vorakh. Somewhere out there, there was an eighth Guardian. A part of Shiviel who had no idea how they were connected to all of this. An eighth Guardian who could potentially power Kane again—if they were united.
“Pray tell,LordRhyan, what exactly you are doing outside your room, sleeping out here with the seraphim,” my father’s voice called from behind me. “Tell me. Now!”
I turned around too late. My father had marched out onto the mount, his personal escort behind him. I was surrounded.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
RHYAN
The wind howled at that moment, the sound almost violent. Rain was pouring down, sinking into my already soaked clothes. All around me, the soturi making up my father’s personal escort stilled, their heads turned toward me, their hands reaching for their weapons. I recognized the bastards. Especially the ones who’d been present for my mother’s death, for her murder.
“I give you one inch,” my father said, “One! And you take a fucking mile.”
My teeth chattered, every part of me shivering, and sore. The scent of damp earth filling my nostrils. “A mile? I’m not even off the grounds of Seathorne,” I seethed. “What more do you want? I’m here aren’t I? I didn’t run!”
He stalked closer, reaching for my chin, squeezing it between his fingers as he wrinkled his nose in disgust. “You smell like gryphon-shit.”
“Well, at least I’m consistent, Your Highness,” I gritted through my teeth. I stepped back from his hold, needing far too much energy to do so. “Now if you give me leave, I’ll return to my room and prepare for our journey.”
“No,” he drawled. “Not yet.”
“For fuck’s sake,” I said. “I’m bound. I’m here. What more do you want from me?”
My father’s chin twitched, and he stroked the edge of his beard, before pulling out his sword. I tensed. But he didn’t point it at me. He turned it in his hand, stroking the red jewel embedded in the hilt. The key. My key. Auriel’s key.
He shook his head, clicking his tongue again. “I don’t think you’re in any position to act as though you’ve done all you can. Not while you’re doing the absolute least to even pretend you like Amalthea.”
My palm itched. But I would not scratch it. I would not move. He had control for this month. I would honor Lyr’s agreement, do what she commanded of me until the Valabellum—but not a second longer. I was going to find a way to get us out. Get her away from him.
“What does it matter to you anyway? Your people don’t care or notice the way I look at her. All they see is a man about to be wed. They don’t notice anything else.” I made sure of it. And it had been easy. Turning off my emotions. Being bound, my aura was already gone.
“You are not just a man. You are my son, a lord of Ka Hart! And to this day, you remain an ungrateful, ignorant wretch.”
My lips pulled back, baring my teeth. “Remind me again of what exactly I’m to be grateful for? Huh? My mother? My new stepmother? Yourcarefultreatment of me all these years?”
“You do realize that I am the one thing standing between you and a permanent position as a chayatim in the Palace. Or worse? You think I didn’t keep your mother safe from being enslaved? You think I haven’t kept you off the Emperor’s radar all these years!”
I wanted to choke him. He’d saved me from nothing. And what he did was not for my sake, but for his. Always, always for his. I could fill a scroll with all the things he’d failed to protect me from. The Senator from Hartavia’s advances. The akadim attacks we’d endured. Watching my mother die at his hands. Losing all of my friends. The scar on my face. The first time my heart broke.
“Never enough. None of it is enough for you,” he sneered. “What more can I do to knock some sense into your thick-headed skull? Maybe I should stop trying to help. Maybe I should hand you off to the Emperor myself. Wouldn’t that be a memorable Valabellum? Watching him strip you of all you are.” His eyes narrowed.
