She studiously ignored him and ate her eggs.“You should eat.Cold eggs suck.”
“I don’t want some half-assed friends with benefits bullshit,” he said firmly before moving to the stool next to her.
She hated that a wave of relief went through her.Hated that she couldn’t quite get a handle on this or him.But if he could be honest first, she could be honest last.“Well, good.Neither do I.”
“That so hard to admit?”
She shrugged, took a long sip of her second cup of coffee.“Maybe.”
“So, what are my other options?”
She glared at him.Pushing the point.Pushingher.But the worst part was he had every right to.“This is going to be complicated,” she said, which was a hedge and they both knew it.
But he didn’t balk.“It is.I knew that going in.Didn’t you?”
“Maybe I didn’t think about it with your tongue down my throat.Among other things.”
He laughed.A real, true laugh.And it warmed her in ways that weren’t just complicated, they were dangerous.
But he sobered all too quickly.“You want to call this a one-off, draw that line between us… well, that’s your choice.I can’t promise to be very noble about it, but it’s your choice.”
“Noble is who you are, Nate,” she muttered reflexively, because it was justtrue.It was the heart of him.And since it was, she figured she couldn’t keep pulling at threads, hoping they’d unravel now rather than later.“I guess the real option is just seeing where this goes.”
“You guess,” he replied, and she could hear the eye roll in his tone, so she glared at him.
“Yeah, what do you guess?”
But he was smiling at her.“That seeing where it goes sounds good.”Then he leaned forward, took her face in his hands, and pressed his mouth to hers.
No half-assed kiss.No half-assed anything from Nate.She wanted to sink into this, to just accept they were seeing where itgoes.
But it was going to go to places neither one of them wanted to admit, if they let it.She wrapped her hands around his wrists, pulled back from his mouth.Just a little.
She couldn’t help but think about last night, about how he couldn’t seem to stomach the thought she might see his leg.Which meant either he’d had a bad experience with someone after he’d gotten hurt, or… “You… haven’t been with anyone since you got hurt?”
He didn’t even hesitate.“Nope.”
It put a bigger weight on things, so she didn’t know why she’d had to ask.“So I’m just special.”
He met her gaze, that direct brown that was always a precursor to a dagger to the heart.“You are.”
She scowled at him, dropping his hands and pulling away completely, refusing to rub at the ache in her chest.“You know you use that direct honesty like a weapon?”
“Yeah.I know.I’m going to keep being direct, Sam.I’m not playing mind games.I’m not going to up and disappear one day.If I have a problem, I’m going to let you know.So you’re going to have to work on giving me the same courtesy.”
“What do you mean?”
“I canhearyou thinking sometimes.When you want to hide whatever it is you’re afraid to want or tell me or deal with.I get it.You’re used to depending on yourself, and that’s no easy habit to break.I am too.I won’t be perfect at it, but I’m going into this with open eyes and the determination totry.”
Try.Her heart twisted.
“I know you’ve got some soft spots.I’m not the kind of guy who goes in for the kill on soft spots.Something hurts, something doesn’t work, you can tell me.You can trust me.”
She wanted to look away.She wanted to be a coward.Buthewas so brave, she didn’t feel right taking the coward’s way out.“I do.”
“You don’t sound happy about that.”
She couldn’t quite meet his gaze for this part.She looked down at the crumbs on her plate, moved them around with her fork.“Trusting people has gotten me a whole lot of hurt.”
