She sighed as she turned in a slow circle, surveying what was left of her childhood memories.
If she was honest, she’d never been happy in Sydney.The only thing keeping her there was her mother and siblings, and she didn’t see them often.Their schedules never seemed to line up.
But Honeybrook was a little too far away from the city for a comfortable daily commute, and Chelsea wouldn’t have much free time after work to deal with a garden this big.
She was foolish to even consider keeping Lilydale.
Her steps took her towards the barn and she hesitated outside.The door was closed, but she hadn’t heard a car leave, so she assumed Ethan was still around.
She couldn’t keep ignoring him.Taking a breath, she knocked on the wooden door and called, “Ethan?”
The door opened almost immediately.His cargo pants and T-shirt were damp with sweat and covered in streaks of dirt.His hair was flat and damp as if he’d been wearing a hat, but somehow when he smiled, he looked sexy, not grungy.
A memory flashed into her mind of her stripping off his shirt on a similarly warm day and helping him wash off the dirt under the hose.
“You don’t need to knock.It’s your place.”
She swallowed hard, pushing the thought away.“You might have been changing.”Which brought images of a clean, dry Ethan only half dressed, which was equally arousing.Not appropriate.
He shrugged.“I’m used to a lack of privacy, but if you don’t mind, I’ll set up a hose as a shower.”
Heat rushed her cheeks as the memory came back stronger.She cleared her throat.“Don’t be silly.Use the bathroom inside.”The words were out of her mouth before she considered the impact of Ethan being in her space.Particularly a wet, naked Ethan.
It had been far too long since she’d been with a man if she was lusting after the one who’d broken her heart.
Still, one of the nicest things about a hard day’s work was the long soaking shower afterwards, and she appreciated his help.
“Are you sure?”
She nodded slowly, not at all certain.“I’ll get you a key to the house.”Or perhaps a cabin would be more sensible.But she couldn’t rescind the offer now.
“Thank you.”
His sincerity spoke to her, and she didn’t like the way her insides warmed.She changed the subject.“The oleander looks good.”
“Thanks.Have you spoken to your mother about Johann?”
A sliver of annoyance slipped through her.It was none of his business.“Yes.She’s agreed not to sell the property to him.”
He tilted his head.“So, what will you do with it?”
She shrugged.“I don’t know.I wasn’t planning to stay here…” The way he looked at her, as if he was hanging on to her every word, reminded her too much of their past, of how it had been so easy to confide her hopes and dreams in him.She pressed her lips together as the old hurt flooded back.
He shifted, placing his hands in his pockets but opening his chest in a friendly, non-threatening stance.“Where are you living at the moment?”
The temptation to tell him her worries was far too strong.Far too dangerous.She couldn’t lose her heart to him again.It had taken her too long to recover the last time.“I’ve come from Sydney.”She checked the time.“I need to go.I’m having dinner with Lauren.I’ll drop the key by before I go.”She strode back to the house, her chest tight.
She knew nothing about him anymore.He could be married or in a serious relationship, and if she let herself care, she would be devastated all over again.He was the only man she’d ever loved.
But he hadn’t loved her.He’d abandoned her like her father had.Hadn’t cared enough, like Ezra.
She hadn’t been good enough.
She had to remember.
But it was so hard to when he looked at her with those eyes that promised he understood who she was to her core.
Apparently she was a sucker.
