I guide her to the sofa and sit her down, then I kneel in front of her and cover her trembling hands with mine.
“Can I get you anything? A drink… Food…” I’m aware that I’m smothering her, but Amelia was already precious to me, and now… Now she’s carrying my baby.
She smiles, and I finally draw a breath that fills my lungs. “You’re not angry?”
“Why would I be angry? I love you, Amelia. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and now you’re going to give me the most precious gift a man could ever hope for.”
Maybe it’s hormones, but her smile fades.
“I’m so sorry that I wasn’t here when you found out. I’m sorry that you had to deal with it alone.” Because of course she didn’tcome to Ireland to have a baby. “But I promise to be beside you every step of the way. Whatever you decide.”
As fucking heartbreaking as it would be if she tells me that she isn’t ready to have my baby.
It feels like an eternity waiting for her to say something. Then, in a tiny voice, “Do you really mean that?”
“A million fucking percent. Having a baby with you would make me very happy, Amelia. I only wish that Ruairi were here to be our child’s big brother.”
She nods, overwhelmed by emotions and my response to the news.
“We should celebrate. There’s champagne in the fridge.”
“I can’t drink alcohol.”
I realize that I’m grinning, but I can’t stop myself. “No, you can’t because you’re carrying our baby.” I cover her belly with my hand. “I didn’t think it possible to love you more, my sweet Amelia.”
“But?”
“But you proved me wrong. Please don’t ever stop proving me wrong.”
“I’ll try.” She wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me long and hard.
Our lips are still locked when I carry her upstairs to my room and set her gently down on my bed.
I hardly get any sleep that night. Traveling always has this effect on me, my brain unable to switch off. But this combined with the closure gained from hunting down Ruairi’s killer, and the news that Amelia is having our baby…
I feel twenty-four years old again. Finding out that Niamh was pregnant with Ruairi, cementing our love with our beautiful baby. Excitement. Anticipation. The element of fear that comes with bringing a child into the world, responsibility for another life, knowing that you must always find a way to do better.
I will do better. I make a silent vow to Amelia while she sleeps.I will protect you and our child with my life.
Orla is already moving about like a shadow downstairs when I slip out from under the covers leaving Amelia asleep. I shower, dress, and head to the kitchen to prepare breakfast.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Orla peers at me from behind her mug of tea, steam curling around her face and giving her an ethereal look.
“Too much going on in here.” I knock my temple with my knuckles. I brew more tea and take my mug to the table to join her. “How are you, Orla? I’m sorry I haven’t been the best company.”
She gives me a wistful smile. “We’re weathering this storm together, Declan. Like we did before.”
I nod. “The business in America is resolved.”
I never discuss the intricacies of mafia business with my mother-in-law, but she understands why I had to go, and what business I’m talking about.
“Eoghan will divide his time between here and there with Emily.”
I swallow a mouthful of tea that’s too hot and wince as it scalds my tongue. I’ve made peace with my youngest son. In the beginning, I encouraged him to use Emily to our family’s advantage, and he found a way to bring our families together. Because he fell in love. And I’m truly happy for him.
“What about you?” Orla asks. “What will you do now?”
I haven’t discussed my feelings for Amelia with her. There simply never seemed to be a right time. But she should be the first to know.
