But then he ran his thumb down the side of her frozen face. And let out a heavy sigh.
‘Don’t cry, Freya. I don’t deserve your tears. I never did.’
‘Oh, just shut up,’ she said, furious now, with herself as well as him. ‘I can’t cut off my emotions the way you can. And I refuse to try. You weren’t honest with me, Theo. You agreed the wedding date with my father three days ago. Why did you lie? When you didn’t have to?’
‘He was going to destroy your reputation, Freya, screw with your brothers the way he had screwed with you. I didn’t want that to happen. I did what I thought was right, to protect you. To protect them.’
‘That’s bullshit and you know it,’ she replied. ‘If you’d told me that marriage was the only way to free my brothers, to save Galicos from bankruptcy that day, I would have agreed. But you didn’t give me all the facts. And because you didn’t, I didn’t have the chance to make those choices for myself.’
He swore softly in Greek, a word she had come to recognise whenever he was angry or frustrated, but the expression on his face was one she’d never seen before, because it was transparent and totally unguarded. The charm and confidence had finally been stripped away completely, until all she could see was the man… And maybe the boy, who had once been so powerless… Because suddenly he looked as hopeless as she felt.
He let out a heavy sigh. ‘Fine, I admit it. I didn’t think you’d agree to marry me if I told you the truth.’
Her breath hitched in her chest, the pain somehow worse because of his regret. ‘What truth?’
‘I want you in my life. I need you. I was terrified of losing you. Of not being enough to deserve you. And you’re right… I convinced myself I had to do it this way. So that damned independent spirit of yours wouldn’t get in the way…’ His gaze swept over her, the approval and yearning in his eyes so transparent now it made her heart feel heavy. ‘Even though your independent spirit is one of the things I adore about you… Ironic, huh?’
‘You’re still not making any sense,’ she said, determined not to back down, not to let him get away with half an explanation.
He cradled her chin, his hand shaking. ‘Don’t you get it, Freya? I planned to trick you into marriage, because that’s what I do. I steal what I don’t deserve. I always have. How could I ask you to marry me, truthfully, honestly, when I couldn’t even tell you I loved you back, because I don’t knowhowto love anyone, Freya. I never have.’
She frowned, taking his hand, pulling it away from her face. ‘You’ll have to do better than that… What about your brother? You love him, don’t you?’
‘Yeah, I guess, but—’
‘For goodness’ sake, Theo, that’s the most pathetic excuse I’ve ever heard in my entire life. For starters, tellingme you love me isn’t even important…’
‘It isn’t?’ He sounded confused now.
‘Of course it isn’t. What matters is that youshowme. If you think the man who helped to save my brothers, who got me over this wall, not once but twice, who went nuts when he thought I’d ventured out into the snow alone doesn’t know how to love me… That’s just ridiculous. Of course, you do. You just have to be willing to trust me, the way I trusted you. To tell me the truth. If you need me,tellme that. If you want me, well, good, because I want you, too. But I refuse to marry you until we’re both ready.’
A huge shiver went through his body, and it occurred to her that they were sitting on top of a freezing wall in the snow and he was wearing only a tuxedo.
She grabbed the rope, and tugged it up. Then slung it off the top of the wall and dropped it down the other side. ‘There’s a ferry in twenty-five minutes. If I hurry, I can make it.’
‘I’ve got a better idea,’ he said, his cold hands cupping her cheeks, his eyes glowing with a naked hope she had never believed possible. ‘My brother’s superyacht is in the bay. We can take it wherever we want.’
‘But what about the land deal?’ she said, unwilling to believe he truly meant it. That she was enough—her own insecurities rearing their ugly head again.
‘I don’t care about the land deal. It was never about that. It was always about you, Freya. You’re what I wanted before I even realised it. It’s why I came back, why I kidnapped you. If you don’t want to be with me after…’ he swallowed heavily ‘…after the shitty way I’ve behaved, I get that. But Iwantto be with you any damn way you’ll have me. So I can prove to you Icando better, that I can be worthy of you, one day…’
The rush of love was so intense it hurt. He was still insecure about his ability to love her, to love anyone, but she knew, in her heart of hearts, he was worth the risk. As long as they set their own terms.
‘My father will be furious,’ she said.
He laughed, the sound gruff with relief. ‘Which just makes it all the sweeter…’ He leaned into her, pressed a cold kiss to her lips, which instantly warmed her insides. ‘Come with me, Freya. Let’s give this a chance.’
Her heart swelled against her ribcage and thundered in her eardrums.
It was a risk. A chance. Another wild leap of faith. But somehow, this time, it felt right. He’d been honest with her, about his fears, his feelings. So they would be in it together. With nothing to lose, and everything to gain.
She grabbed the lapels of his jacket, dragged him back for another kiss. ‘Just be warned, I may never want to marry you. I’m not sure I’m cut out to be anyone’s wife.’
He only laughed more. ‘Do I look like someone who’s cut out to be anyone’s husband?’ he said. But then he pressed his hand to his heart. ‘We’ll do this our way, Freya, the way that works for us. And if that means living in sin for the rest of our lives, I’m in. Because you’re the only woman I will ever need.’
Her heart bounced in her chest. He didn’t realise that what he had declared was already love. It would take him time to realise, but they had time now.
Time to make their own rules.
