“Right then. What’s the problem? Who do we have to save this time?” he asks, referring to their little self-styledOcean’s Elevenoperation when they were saving Ben’s wife from her evil ex.
Yeah. That was a thing. Only in the Carter family.
“You all remember Sadie?” My question is met with mumbles of agreement. “Well, there’s a problem.”
“What have you done?” Will asks. It’s annoying he assumes it was me. Even if it is accurate.
It takes another bottle of wine, dozens of questions and a lot of backtracking before the story is told. Although I’ve held back on possibly the single most important thing. Because I think Sadie should be the first to hear that I love her.
Turns out that’s not necessary.
“I told you I liked her when you brought her to Bangalay. And it was blindingly obvious you were well on your way to being in love with her then,” Will says.
“What?” I don’t know why I’m shocked. These guys are smart. And perceptive. Regardless of how they sometimes behave.
“Yep.” Josh nods.
“Oh, yeah.” The grin on Ben’s face just about breaks it in half.
“And I’d be shocked if she didn’t feel the same. But we digress. What you need now is advice on what to do.” Will looks conflicted. On the one hand, he’s clearly bursting to tell me what to do. On the other, the last time he gave me advice, it came back to bite him on the arse. It’s time to put that to bed. For good.
“Before we get to that, I owe you an apology, Will. What I said to you at Jessie’s funeral was unfair. Sure, you advised me to wait on getting married. But if I’m being honest with myself, that was what I wanted to hear. I wasn’t ready. It wasn’t that I didn’tlove Jess. You know I did. But for her, marriage meant babies. I wasn’t ready for that. I’m still not. It was wrong of me to blame you.” By the end of my little monologue, my voice is hoarse with unshed tears.
“Ah, fuck. Look what you’ve gone and done.” Josh picks up a serviette and hands it to Will, who has tears running down his cheeks.
“Thank you, E. That means a lot. I never wanted to hurt you.”
I’m up and out of my chair and so is he, and we’re hugging in a way we haven’t done since before Jessie died.
“I know, Wee. I’m so sorry I hurt you.”
“Just as well Nick’s not here. All this kumbaya stuff would be too much for him,” Ben says from behind me. “Now, if we’re finished with the waterworks can we get back to the problem at hand? I have a wife and baby to get home to.”
“So. Advice?” I sit back down and take a gulp of wine to clear the tears from my throat.
Ben, Will and Josh all look at one another, communicating silently as only people who have known each other all their lives, and have been through the wringer of life together, can do.
“I think you already know what you need to do. You need to prove she can trust you. That you’ll put her first,” Will says. And he’s right. I know exactly what I have to do, and I’ll have no regrets about doing it.
“And once you’ve done it, bring Sadie over for family dinner. I think we’d all like to get to know her,” Ben adds.
“That’s if she can forgive me. If I can get her back. Well, not back, since we’ve never actually been together, but … you know.”
“Yeah. We know. And if she doesn’t forgive you, you haven’t done it right,” Josh, the master of the grand gesture, cuts in.
“Do you need any help? Backup? We could get the band back together,” Ben refers to the collection of misfits who helped him get Rosanna out of her predicament.
“Nah. I think I’m good.”
We polish off the last of the wine and make our way out to the Ubers we’ve called.
“One last thing,” Will says as he’s climbing into the car. “Mum will tear you a new one if you let Sadie go under the bus.”
As if I didn’t already know that.
“Don’t worry. I’ve got this.”
They didn’t give me any concrete advice on what to do. But I realise that’s not what I came here for. Because I’ve known what I had to do all along. I came here to share the load. Experience their unquestioned, unconditional support. Knowing my brothers have my back, no matter what, has settled me even more than I expected.
