Mom rolls her eyes.She thinks everything is winking at her,she muses to herself.
Georgie has excellent priorities,Sherlock points out.But I’d have a tough time choosing between food and fancy bath products. It’s a real struggle.
Unlike Fish, Sherlock does appreciate a good bubble bath.
Several more people take their turns, and the gift selection continues peacefully until we get to number twelve—which belongs to a perfectly coiffed woman who takes one look at Georgie’s spa collection and moves in for the kill.
“I’m so sorry, hon,” she says to Georgie with the kind of smile that suggests she’s not sorry at all, “but I simply must have that spa collection. I have such sensitive skin, you understand.”
Georgie’s expression shifts from delight to betrayal to something that could probably be classified as a natural disaster.
“Well,” she says with dangerous sweetness. “I suppose I’ll just have to find something even better, won’t I? Game on, sister.”
She surveys the opened gifts with newfound determination and selects a package of what appears to be a set of genuine crystal ornaments, each one looking far too fragile to be handled by mere mortal hands.
“These will look perfect on my tree,” she announces loudly enough for the spa thief to hear. “I can appreciate quality craftsmanship. Unlike some people who clearly don’t.”
The game continues, and I’m starting to see why people get addicted to this particular form of socially acceptable theft. There’s something oddly thrilling about watching perfectly respectable adults engage in legalized larceny over luxury bath products.
Macy’s number finally comes up.
“Oh boy,” I mutter to Buffy. “Brace for impact.”
She surveys the situation with calculating precision as if she’s been planning this moment since she drew her number, and her gaze lands squarely on Georgie’s crystal ornaments.
“Those ornaments are absolutely stunning,” she says with the kind of cultured appreciation that suggests she knows good crystal when she sees it. “I simply must have them for my collection.”
“Spoiler alert,” I whisper to Buffy, “Macy doesn’t have a crystal collection.Yet.”
The sound Georgie makes could most accurately be described as a wounded water buffalo.
“Macy Louise Baker!” she gasps, clutching the ornament box like it contains the crown jewels. “You wouldn’t dare!”
“I most certainlywould,” Macy replies with the cool efficiency of a woman who’s just executed a perfectly planned heist. “After all, I do appreciate fine crystal more than some people.”
Oh, this means war,Fish mewls with fascination—and a touch too much glee.I’ve seen both Macy and Georgie get moreterritorial over things than a dog with a bone. It’s going to be delicious.
Georgie is forced to select another gift, and she unwraps what appears to be a designer handbag that looks like it should come with a velvet throne and a tiara. For a moment, I think she might be satisfied with this consolation prize.
“At least this is practical,” she mutters, examining the bag with what looks to be a grudge.
But then the spa thief decides she wants the handbag, too.
“I hate to do this again,” the woman says, not sounding sorry at all, “but that bag would go perfectly with my winter wardrobe.”
The expression on Georgie’s face could melt steel beams.
“That’s it!” she declares, marching over to reclaim her crystal ornaments from Macy. “Age before beauty, sister!”
“That’s not how the rules work!” Macy protests, but Georgie is already clutching the ornament box with both hands.
“Rulesschmules,” Georgie shoots back. “I picked these first, and I’m taking them back!”
“If Georgie Conner wants something, Georgie Conner is going to get it,” Mom muses under her breath. “And that goes for gossip, glitter, and apparently, crystal ornaments.”
Matilda looks like she’s watching her elegant Christmas gathering unravel faster than a cat with a roll of yarn.
“Ladies,” she says with the kind of strained cheerfulness that suggests she’s one candy cane away from snapping. “Perhaps we could all remember the spirit of Christmas giving?”
