Cade nods slowly. “For some reason, I don’t think you are.” He pauses, eyes searching my face. “Be patient with her.”
With that, he strides past me, patting me on the shoulder.
I drop my chin to my chest, my hands landing on my hips. Nothing about tonight has turned out the way I thought it would. Suddenly, I feel exhausted. Pivoting to the elevators, I head to my room.
In the morning,I feel no more rested than when I went to bed last night. My mind kept replaying the entire night, all our interactions, hoping I could find one misread cue. Something that would give me any insight into why Olive would just up and leave me like she did.
As I climb out of the shower, I have no more answers now than when I went to bed.
But that kiss.
There’s no doubt in my mind that she enjoyed that as much as I did. My dick twitches just thinking about her mouth. Her full lips. And sweet smiles.
I hope she’ll open up to me about what happened. Even beyond the physical, which I’m convinced will be life-changing, last night was the most enjoyable time I’ve had with a woman in a very long time. Maybe even forever.
Be patient with her.
Cade’s words play on repeat in my head.What does that mean?
Hopefully, I get the chance to find out today.
By the time I finish packing my suitcase, I still have some time to kill before we fly out. Making the decision to walk to the coffee shop down the street from the hotel, I grab my wallet and phone. I ignore the part of me that lights up at the thought of maybe seeing Olive there, knowing the likelihood of that happening twice in two different cities is practically nonexistent.
It’s overcast but warm when I step outside. As the cool breeze sweeps by me, a feeling I had been ignoring starts to take hold of my heart. The disappointment and perplexity I feel about Olive leaving is mixed with a sense of… Relief is the wrong word, but it’s the only way to describe it simply to myself.
Which can’t be right, because I’m certainly not relieved that I didn’t get to spend the night with her.
After I get my coffee from the barista and take a seat outside, I still haven’t resolved anything in my mind about my confusing feelings. I roll my neck, hoping stretching my muscles will help smooth out the whirlwind of emotions. My phone vibrates, and I shift in my chair to pull it from my pocket. I smile when I see the name. “Good morning, Pamela.”
“Nate, I know you’re busy with this new job, but I’m so glad I caught you. I wanted to talk to you about a few things for when you are back in a couple of weeks.” Pamela rambles on about dinners, birthday parties, and soccer games. I respond accordingly, albeit a bit distracted.
When she takes a breath, I seize the break to ask a question that started to take shape while she was talking. “Do you think I’m messed up from Mom and Dad?”
Our parents were the best. They loved each other just as fiercely as they loved us kids. We had the picture-perfect childhood and family. The kind some people dream about and that others pretend to have.
Until it all ended.
One horrible rainstorm on a country road at night, and they were gone. I was overseas when my sisters called me. I’ve never felt pain like that. Pamela is a licensed therapist specializing in PTSD, so she helped us all navigate the aftermathof their deaths the best she could, all while also dealing with her own heartbreak.
She takes a moment to answer, then says softly, “I think we all are, to some extent. Why do you ask?”
I shrug, even though she can’t see me, and sip of my coffee to gather my thoughts. “I know you were already with Joseph when it happened, but did you ever get scared about loving him because you were afraid you were going to lose him?”
“Of course, I felt fear, but not about loving him. Honestly, I felt fearful about everyone. Any time anyone was out of my sight, I was terrified I would never see them again.” She’s silent for a moment. “Do you want to tell me what brought this on?”
If there’s anyone in my life that I can be completely vulnerable with, it’s Pamela. “What if I can’t fall in love because of that fear?”
A surprised laugh hits my ear. “I’m not laughing at you or your feelings, Nate. I’m just a little shocked you would even ask that.” She laughs again, but this time, the sound is a little more somber. “You love harder than anyone I’ve ever met. Look at Jack. Ian. Tyler. And now Ella. Not to mention, all the other employees at Nash. Look at how you love me, Lori, and our significant others. You love my kids more than anything in this world. How could you ever think you can’t fall in love with the luckiest woman on earth one day?”
I blink a few times, grateful I have sunglasses on, and clear my throat of the new wave of emotion her words brought on. My words feel scratchy coming out. “Thanks, Pam. I needed that.”
I’mthe last to enter the plane, and when I take the final step, my gaze roams the faces, searching for the one that haunts me.
Just as I am turning to walk down the aisle to my seat, the lavatory door opens. Cade steps out, and my face drops in disappointment. “Where’s Olive?”
Cade grimaces. “She isn’t here.”
“Wait, what? Why not? Did she oversleep again?” I glance at the time on my phone. It’s pretty late in the day, but maybe she couldn’t sleep last night for some reason.
