I push all thoughts aside and live in this moment. I want to take and give as much pleasure imaginable in our time together. The future is uncertain. I don’t know what she’ll do when we’re done; this could be our only time.
She grumbles in protest when I disengage my mouth from her breasts. I want to watch. Leaning back on my elbows, I enjoy the scene before me. The glow of the full moon bounces off her skin in varying angles as she uses me for her needs. Our moans, the slap of our skin, and the crashing of the waves work together to create the sexiest harmony of sounds I’ve ever heard. Believe it or not, I’ve never had sex on the beach. This is a new experience that will remain stuck in my memory. Forever.
Her walls clench when my cock thickens. My orgasm is coming soon, and I would like for her to go before me. I know we’re on the same page when she runs her hands up my abdomen; one palm rests on my left peck while the other grabs my right shoulder. She swivels her hips in a way that feels so damn good; I abandon the last piece of my reserve. Moaning with gusto, I slam up into her as I watch her tits bounce. My body is taut with the need to cum. My hand snakes out, and the pad of my thumb presses the erect bundle of nerves. I circle it twice, and her body stiffens. Her head falls back like a wolf worshipping the moon.
Her body clenches me so tight; each pulse tugs me to completion. Hot cum fills the condom as I fall on my back.
“Uhhhhh!” I muster as I ride out one of the most powerful orgasms I’ve ever had.
Her head falls on my chest, and her breath heats it with hot puffs. About thirty percent of the fog I’ve been living under dissipates. I stare at the stars mystified. I don’t know her story, but I plan to find out.
Tomorrow.
Beau
The sun isa harsh sleep killer. Its overly happy rays tickle my naked torso while highlighting it with gold streaks. My usual morning grump is not as pronounced. Usually, when I awake from the brief reprieve of sleep, I remember my loss and become angry for a minimum of thirty minutes. During that time, I’m not a person anyone wants to encounter. After that, I move from angry to aggrieved for the rest of the day.
I feel different. I don’t know if it’s the wonderful sleep I’ve just had or the mystery I still need to solve. A roll onto my side confirms what I already knew—she’s not lying next to me. She’s still here; there’s an awareness hovering over me that I didn’t have in the last few years of living alone. Plus, I can hear faint movements below me. In the kitchen, maybe? I don’t smell any food or coffee to solidify my guess.
I settle on my back while releasing the air from my lungs. Staring at the ceiling, I wait to feel regret. I don’t. I scrub my hand over my face. I contemplate my confusion at the lack of regret I feel. Am I ready to move on? Will I feel regret later? I’d always assumed that sleeping with another woman would make me feel like I was cheating on Sara. Instead, my brain wants to relive last night.
After we found enough energy to move, I took her to the outdoor shower, where we bathed between kisses. There was something freeing in our anonymity. In the still night, who we were didn’t matter. My problems were mine, and hers were hers. Our responsibilities were our own and non-existent. The only thing that mattered was our naked bodies and the pleasure we could give each other. The water flowed in fat drops while collecting the moonlight. The shadows of the night, coupled with the moon, gave her a whitish-blue glow as she tilted her head under the water while she shampooed her curly locks; she looked dreamlike—almost celestial.
We dried ourselves off outside; then, I led her into the house through the kitchen. I didn’t feel the stab of pain I’d expected to feel upon entering the home I shared with my wife. Instead, I feel like I’m discovering it. I’d put my mom in charge and hired a crew to remove Sara’s belongings. Everything of value was appraised and put in a safe deposit box at my bank in the city. I’d opted to stay at my city apartment while my mom led a construction crew through renovating the house.
I’d seen glimpses of pictures of the changes but didn’t have the fortitude to care. My mom then picked someone to look after the house and periodically clean it to keep it dust-free. It didn’t look like my house; it didn’t smell like it either. It was both promising and saddening; I hated that most traces of my love were gone, save for a few photos, but I knew it would have been harder to enter the house with reminders of us all around. I chose to focus on the woman I guided through the dark. I can worry about everything else when the day breaks.
Using the moonlight, I lead her up the stairs into the other master bedroom. We used to occupy the one on the main floor. It didn’t feel right bringing a virtual stranger into a room I shared with my wife. I know it’s not the exact same since it’s been remodeled; the furniture, layout, and wall color may be different, but it’s the same space.
The comforter was already turned down. I dropped my bag on the floor, and our naked bodies collapsed on the bed. The ultra-soft, cotton sheets felt almost satin, and the mattress hugged us to perfection. I pulled her to my side as I rested on my back. Her head nestled between my arm and chest just right, I released a content sigh as my eyes drifted shut.
My visitor had other plans. Her silky leg slid over my coarse one. Her fingers toyed with the light dusting of hair on my chest then proceeded to circle one of my nipples on the way down my body. My skin tingled and my blood heated. I was instantly hard; my dick tented the sheets. I was still amazed at my body’s reaction to her. I’d been sexually uninterested in any woman for three years. Even as I stared at my erect appendage, I didn’t know if it was because of her specifically or if it was my body deciding it was time to move forward.
Either way, by the time her fingers circled my belly button then followed my happy trail underneath the covers to tease my mushroomed tip, I was capturing her mouth in another kiss, rolling her onto her back, and sliding my hard body against hers. Her hungry whimper greeted my moan. She’d tried to wrap her legs around me, but I used my hand to pin her hip to the bed. Her dark eyes glowed hungry in the moonlight, her chest heaved with desire, and her silky belly caressed the underside of my cock. I’d wanted to chisel the memory into my head.
I reached out to my bag beside the bed, careful not to fall. I sat back on my haunches to apply the condom, but my mystery lover sat up, yanked the wrapper out of my hand, opened it, and slid it into place without breaking eye contact. I didn’t think it was possible, but my dick was harder than I remember it being, ever. She fell back, opened her legs wider, and jutted her hips toward me.
I slammed into her and my eyes rolled back; she was hotter and wetter than she was on the beach. It was as if her body decided I was its favorite craving. She nipped my collarbone, and her fingernails scraped my back. I pumped into her wild and hard until I feared I was too rough; however, the heels of her feet dug into my ass cheeks whenI tried to slow my pace.
“More. Don’t stop.” Her breathy plea shattered my fear of hurting her.
I gave her exactly what she wanted until she’d let out a hoarse cry and crumbled beneath me.
A muffled noise pulls me back into the moment. I glance at the clock on my nightstand—12:30 PM. Sighing, I climb out of bed, ready to face my reality. I know we cannot stay in this nameless, conversation-less place. I mull over my thoughts and expectations as I relieve myself, shower, and brush my teeth. I lean on the counter and stare at my reflection in the mirror.
I don’t expect myself to look different but I stare anyway. The same dark brown—almost black wavy hair is on my head, my eyes are still the same intense dark green they’ve always been—Sara called them piercing.
I look closer; the dark circles aren’t quite there anymore. Even after falling asleep past 4:30 a.m.
I count in my head, then shrug. Okay, I don’t remember the last time I slept solidly for almost seven hours. I’m not mad, though. I have nothing to do besides finding out more about my mystery guest. We have to lay out what the night hid in the light of day.
I pull on underwear, jeans, and a cotton tee. Gray, just like the space I’m in right now. Gray isn’t all bad. It’s not the bottomless pit of black that I was afraid would engulf me one day. I’ll take gray for now. I’d prefer to be in a calm green or a happy, vibrant yellow place one day, but that is not in my cards yet. One day at a time…gray will do.
I comb my hair into its normal, side-part, lawyer coif that I’ve perfected over the years. It’s far more formal than my clothes, but I haven’t vacationed in a long while, opting to bury myself in work, focus on things I can control like my hair, the neatness of the spaces around me, my wrinkle-free clothing—control and order. That’s what propelled me through the last few years; yet, I seemed to have lost some of that in the wee hours of the morning.
I shake those thoughts away. The woman downstairs didn’t take my control; I relented in the moment. Yet, even with the time we’ve had together, I can’t help but feel the nerves brewing deep in the pit of my stomach. What if she’s crazy? Currently robbing me blind? Married? All questions I should have explored last night.
I pad to the landing and begin my descent down the distressed, white-wood stairs with the bamboo runner; my mind reels faster. It doesn’t remain on the same topic. I take in the space and notice that my mom really went for the beach cottage look. The mute lawyer part of my brain is raging now that I’m sexually sated and alert. By the time my feet settle on the wood floor, I have full-blown angina. Okay, that’s dramatic, but my chest is a little tight with worry. It was a bad decision to bring a stranger into my house without first discovering something about her other than how good she feels on my dick.
